Meal choice on RSVP – vague or descriptive?

posted 3 years ago in Food
  • poll: Vague or Descriptive?
    Vague : (55 votes)
    67 %
    Descriptive : (24 votes)
    29 %
    Other? : (3 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 2
    2606 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2017 - Valleybrook Country Club

    jellybellynelly :  I just did Chicken, Beef, or Salmon. A few curious people texted to ask what type of meals for a description, but most people didn’t mind and gave their answer.

    Post # 3
    2631 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    This is tricky.  As someone with food allergies, and I’m a rather picky eater, I would really want to know what the exact dish was.  If it was vague, I would be pretty annoyed, but I wouldn’t text for any clarification- unless it was a very close friend’s wedding.

    On the other hand, if you end up switching the meals, that doesn’t help me at all when I’m trying to pick a dish based on my dietary needs…  How likely is it that you’ll switch the meals around?

    Post # 4
    6294 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2014

    We gave full descriptions due to the sides differing, as we felt that may affect people’s selections (eg the steak came with a side dish of peppercorn sauce, sautéed potatoes, and wilted spinach; whereas the salmon was served with spring onion and herb crushed potatoes and a white wine veloute). We were also giving choices for the starter and dessert  so this played into it too (eg if someone was picking the fruit salad for dessert they might go for a heavier main). If you may upgrade though I would stick with vague, as your examples of salmon vs swordfish/rib eye vs fillet are very different (I know people who prefer rib eye to fillet, and if the choice were fillet, would go with fish instead). If you keep it vague there is less room for disappointment if you do upgrade. 

    Another option is to describe the dishes so people know what they are choosing, and then upgrade elsewhere eg larger drinks selection/extra canapés/more cake flavours/etc. This is what we did as for us having people be able to to select their meals was important, and it was really appreciated by the guests. We then added an additional canapé, and 2 extra choices on the evening buffet. 

    Post # 5
    939 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

    We just did beef, chicken or vegitarian and then had a line under that saying please list any dietary restrictions so people can write allergies and whatever else.

    ETA: our menu tasting is after invites go out anyways and also WAY after we had to order them so either way this would be our choice.

    Post # 7
    3028 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2008

    Vague is better for exactly the reason you stated. The only time it makes sense to be specific is for something unusual like a vegan wedding.

    I would also leave a line so people can write any allergies or dietary restrictions. 

    Post # 9
    9588 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2016

     I’d go vague: dishes can change due to ingredient availability, so even if YOU don’t change your mind the dish may change slightly.  I think saying which cut is safe enough if you want to, but I wouldn’t write it out like a menu.

    Post # 10
    819 posts
    Busy bee

    In another other situation, I’d say be descriptive, because the sides and whatnot could really make a difference in people’s decisions. However, if you’re going to have to upgrade things to meet a budget, definitely just give the vague description so that you cover all your bases.

    Post # 11
    284 posts
    Helper bee

    I have a bunch of friends who have done vague on the card itself, but listed the options with more description on their websites just so that people who cared could find out. I believe they had an insert with their website that said more information (including about meal choices) could be found there.

    Post # 12
    164 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2017

    A little bit of mystery can be a good thing, make people’s mouths water on the day of, with your full menu! Especially if you have an area already for dietary restrictions, I’d keep it a bit vague. 

    Saying that, I am so excited about our menu and am having trouble keeping my mouth shut. But I already did share a few details, and now those are things I can’t really change… (We have already had to change something we told a few people about, and I’m really sad about it…) 

    Post # 13
    828 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2017

    You definitely need to let people know what kind of fish it will be. Chicken and beef, I think people are a little less wary and will just go with it. Fish, people won’t order unless they know what its going to be or they’re pescatarian and don’t really have a choice anyways.

    We had a bunch of people assume we were serving salmon, so we were sure to put on the RSVP card that it was rockfish. 

    Post # 14
    1212 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    I would go with descriptive- that’s what we’re planning on doing. If you just say “beef/chicken/fish” there’s a huge difference between the different types of beef/chicken/fish dishes they could actually be. Also for the vegetarian- I’m not a vegetarian but I could see myself choosing the vegetarian option if the description looked good.

    I choose my meal for weddings based on what option looks best, I don’t usually just go with the beef or chicken every time regardless- do many people do this? (Obviously, outside of any dietary restrictions.)

    Post # 15
    995 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    We were a little more descriptive just so people would know the types of flavors they were getting. Our choices were “Mediterranean Chicken,” “Asian Salmon,” and “Butternut Squash Ravioli.” Enough so people knew what to expect but not with getting down to every detail of sauces, sides, and preparation.


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