- 5 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
My family and H’s family have never met. We were married in August 2012. We thought of doing an immediate family only wedding in our state (like put our feelers, share our plans – but no actual invitations), and my family had excuses as to why they could not travel. I didn’t even mention which month I was thinking. My mom said I was asking too much of my sisters to fly out.
We ended up getting married out of the country and only invited H’s parents to be our witnesses (the wedding was so lovely!). This is the second time my family missed seeing me get married. Very odd for a family, no?
The wedding would have been the first time everyone would have met. If we don’t plan something, they will never meet. We are in UT, half in OR, the other half in IN. I think they are all fine if they never meet (they aren’t related to each other), it’s more for me and H.
A while ago, H and I considered having an 1st anniversary party in August 2013 at our house. We’d invite our families, we’d host them in our house for several days (we have four spare rooms and a second living room). If the ILs sleep in their RV in our driveway, everyone can stay at our house for free. That’s 15 people total including us.
I’ve always dreamed of renting a big house (or use our house) and having everyone sleep there, eating together, playing together. This was kind of how the wedding idea went in my head. There are so many things to do in our area, it’s so pretty, we have mountains, and some family has never visited us yet. It’s never happened before! My side is a little drama filled, so I never thought it could ever work.
My sister just called me yesterday to see if this plan is still on. ?!?!?!? She’s willing to go with her two kids. It’s 7+ months away but she needs to schedule vacation time soon! ILs are willing to go – but I just told them over Christmas that I was not doing this for fear of disappointment. I don’t know about the others though, but 2 of the 5 households would come so far.
I don’t know if I’m up for this. If I don’t get participation this time around, or people decline, I am not sure I want to deal with the disappointment ALL OVER AGAIN. I am still hurt enough that I don’t want to visit THEM any time soon – so planning something now for August… am I ready for this?
H is up for inviting everyone/hosting/party, but advises me to not do it if I’m going to be hurt about it. However, if I cannot get them here for a wedding + free vacation, how am I going to get them here for just a party + free vacation?
Or just say everyone can visit us whenever they want, if they have thetime/resources to do so – doesn’t have to overlap with everyone.