(Closed) Men and their priorities

posted 10 years ago in Waiting
Post # 32
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Arrghhhh – why do boys think rings are so expensive in the grand scheme of things? My SO has only been working for a few months, so I understand somewhat, but I pay for 2/3 of our expenses, which is fair because I make a 1/3 more than him. And he doesn’t realise that you can finance rings which I would be more than happy to help pay off! Not to mention that I will be paying for the wedding arggghhh!

Post # 33
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Welcome! I think anyone; Waiting or Married can tell you that we all want to club our men every now and then. I’m sure most ladies here can tell you they know the feeling. Unfortunatly it’s part of the waiting game. There’s no “magic wand” to make it happen. lol that’s been discussed before. Know that we’re all here to understand and help you get through! It sucks but unfortunatly; boys will be boys….

Post # 34
Member
1645 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

@maeby: My friend was saving for a house, which they wanted to buy before having kids. But her husband had a tendancy to go spend money on golf clubs, $50 per video game, and electronic equiptment too! I know how frustrating it was for her, and feel for you.

Post # 35
Member
47 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Men are weird. I also think part of the reason we are all “waiting” is because they all of a sudden realize that people will be asking to see the ring and staring at this piece of jewelry for years and years and they want it to accurately reflect their virility. At least this is the impression that I got from my bf who says that if we wait another 10 months, he can get an “even better” ring. Um, we could wait 20 years and you could get me the Hope Diamond, but I don’t care about a giant rock nor want one! Having said that, I DO NOT want to be the girlfriend who begs for a ring. I have sort of said that I’d be OK with waiting until he feels financially ready for a ring purchase as long we agree not to talk about any more. I just don’t want to ruin the whole eperience by talking it to death. I still want that surprise element and to not feel like we’ve been shopping for a vacuum and then all of a sudden – ta-da! –  we have a vacuum. Anybody feel that way? That’s part of the reason I vent on WB.

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@yaneres @maeby @Mewcakes: The electronics thing is so weird. My bf also wants these random things.  You should make a deal: I’ll buy you a Nano if you get the ring.

BUT – I also don’t want to be the kind of gf who is always questioing how her bf spends his money if its not money spent on me! That doesn’t mean it doesn’t bother me sometimes though.

Post # 36
Member
446 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@maeby: Haha! The part at the end also made me laugh, about him buying expensive electronics πŸ™‚ Don’t worry, he’ll get there.

My girlfriend was waiting for her Fiance to propose and what do you know, he buys her DIAMOND EARRINGS (and she doesn’t even have pierced ears) and then a DIAMOND NECKLACE!!! He was supposed to be saving up for the ring! He had even asked me her ring size!

For my birthday, my Fiance bought me diamond earrings.  The only thing I could manage to say was “I HOPE THESE DIDNT COST A LOT” because he was supposed to be saving up for the ring!

Boys are sooooooo funny sometimes.  I know you don’t want to hear this but once you ARE engaged, it will mean all that much more. 

Also, if its a possibility that he does think you want a big huge ring, you should drop hints … when you see huge diamond rings, just say “ew her ring is WAY too big…how gaudy” or “that thing would look ridiculous on my finger, yuck” or something like that (even if you think it’s nice) so he doesn’t think he needs to buy one that big for you.

Post # 37
Member
301 posts
Helper bee

@maeby: oh my gosh i feel ya!! my bf bought another corvette whn he already has one!! who needs two? and, they look exactly the same. really dude???

Post # 38
Member
211 posts
Helper bee

@maeby:  THANK YOU!

Oh my god!

Don’t get me wrong, loooooove my SO. Adore him. He talks about being married more than *I* do.  I tend to look at pretty things online anyway, but have made it very, very clear which I would want for an ering.  My dream ring is only $172 dollars but he’s totally tech crazy. New iPhone, anything.  If it has an on button, he wants it!  I do think it’s kind of funny, though.  He teases me for going laser-beam towards the jewelry counters while Heidi Klum couldn’t even coax him away from the new iPad! πŸ˜€

Soooo glad to see a thread like this. πŸ˜€

Post # 39
Member
211 posts
Helper bee

@maeby:  Okay, so I totally didn’t look at how old the thread was. (teeheee) but based on the date by your sn, congrats!!!! πŸ˜€

Post # 41
Member
328 posts
Helper bee

Men are interesting, the men that love us are sometimes so stubborn. I told my man I didn’t mind the price, it was just the fact that he would pick it out was what mattered to me. He whispered in my ear as we werre laying side by side “I know you want a ring that could sink you if your swimming and I want to buy you the most beautiful ring that would match such a beautiful woman.”

 

Cheesy yes πŸ™‚ Did I melt, oh yeah, but, it made me think that we don’t give our men the credit their due sometimes. I am as frustrated and antsy as anyone, but, sometimes when i’m waiting, I like to think that it takes a bit longer because he’s thinking about or crafting the ideal ring he would want his wife to wear, that he’s putting alot of love into the selection. I.E the longer the wait, the more love and more expensive ring I might get? lol (Just a thought or fantasy)

and look at the recent angelina and brad pitt engagment, he took a year to even design that so that not only was it gorgeous but fit his future bride’s fingers just right πŸ™‚

Post # 42
Member
1114 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Just a story for those of you who are waiting for your Boyfriend or Best Friend to save up for the ring. I totally thought that’s what my Boyfriend or Best Friend was waiting for (or at least one of the things he was waiting for). Any time I brought it up, he said he was saving for it, not to worry.

He wasn’t ever really buying big things. Or at least not doing things that I couldn’t afford to also do (BF makes way more money than me, so if I could afford 1/2 our trip to Disney, he can afford 1/2 our trip to Disney and still pay for the ring).

Then at the begining of February, after I had been waiting for like 6 months for the ring, he’s all “Hey, how would you feel about renoing the bathrooms? Like completely gutting them and starting from studs?” First thought that went into my head was “Hell no, not if that means you won’t be able to afford a ring any time soon!” We renoed one bathroom (and ended up going over budget), but about a month after that, we went ring shopping, and he spent way more on my ring than I anticipated he would. He had been saving for the ring, but also for other things too.

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