(Closed) Men who don't wear their wedding bands

posted 6 years ago in Rings
Post # 16
Member
1026 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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Kimbalina81:  I couldn’t care less.  I’m glad my husband wears a ring.  But I don’t have any thoughts or opinons on the next guy.

I can assure you that men who cheat do so with or without a ring.  I think a ring has exactly zero bearing on that.  

Post # 17
Member
1113 posts
Bumble bee

My Fiance can’t wear a wedding band as he works in surgery, but plans on wearing it full time outside of work…

I know a few couples who are not american that are married and do not wear wedding bands or e-rings.  I know in some cultures (even if you are born in the US) it’s just not as traditional or important. 

My boss doesn’t wear his wedding band because he just doesn’t like the feeling. 

My FI’s mother doesn’t wear her wedding set.  She wears her band on occasion.  My grandmother also didn’t wear her wedding band.  Meh.

Now if someone normally wore it and took it off conveniently at certain times, that’s fishy.

Post # 18
Member
6299 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I grew up in a home where my dad, a mechanic, never wore a ring….ever. Even with his marriage to my stepmom he’s never worn a ring. He works all day, and then comes home. Even his hobbies involve being dirty and rugged. I have a few friends who have DH’s that don’t wear rings.

My DH always wears his ring, other than occasionally when it needs to be removed for some reason. We were actually having dinner with friends one night and the topic of guys not wearing their wedding band came up and out of the blue my DH commented that he thought it was disrepectful to not wear it. Surprised me, because while I find it very attractive on him, I’m not a crazy ring Nazi that would freak if he didn’t wear it.

I do a lot of activies that I don’t like to wear mine, and I ordered a Qalo ring for – I love it! I actually find that I wear it a lot because I put it on and forget about it.

Post # 19
Member
1059 posts
Bumble bee

I have experience with this.  And it hurts but I’ll try to recount them and give my opinion. 

My EX-DH did not wear a ring.  He was adamant that I do, but he never did.  He never introduced me to work friends, in fact, his work  boss was the only one who knew he was married.  Whenever we go to the mall and he sees a cousin, he hides and moves away from me and our child.  I thought I was being a loving wife when I allowed this, but then when I started going to therapy I realized that my daughter and I were considered his posession and not his family.  This went on for 6 years. 

So, I guess you can tell, I have a strong feeling about this.  My current SO has ALWAYS introduced me to friends, talks about me to his coworkers, and is VERY VERY PROUD of me and what I have achieved as a human being.  He says that I inspire him to work harder and achieve more as a FT student worker.  He has never hid our relationship, always holds my hand in public, and is EXCITED to ring shop for himself (which I think is just so darn cute). 

Personally I would like my SO to sport a ring, but for others, that’s just not my business. 

Post # 20
Member
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

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Kimbalina81:  I don’t think it’s strange at all. Then again, my father never wore a band and he just celebrated his 41st wedding anniversary with my mom. When I was younger and asked why he didn’t wear a wedding ring, his response was, “I don’t wear jewelry. I don’t understand men that wear jewelry.”

If my husband didn’t want to wear a band, I’d think nothing of it. But I admit I get real excited when I see that ring on his finger. Real. Excited.

Post # 21
Member
5641 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

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Kimbalina81:  There was a guy that we met just yesterday who said he was in town on business for the next four months, he is married, but he wasn’t wearing a wedding band. I can’t help but feel a little upset when I see this. Thoughts?

It doesn’t bother me one bit.  DH has never used his wedding band.  We’ve been together for 25 years in which I haven’t had any doubts he acts like the married man he is 100% of the time.  I’ve seen married people cheating with their wedding rings on, so to me, the presence of a ring doesn’t mean anything if the person wants to cheat.

Post # 22
Member
999 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2016

My Fiance doesn’t want to wear a wedding band because he’s a very minimilistic guy who doesn’t like jewelry. He picked out a very cheap ($20, lol) ring that we’ll use for the ceremony and photos and I’ve asked that he try out wearing it for 2 or 3 months after we get married to see if he gets used to it and changes his opinion, but he’s already said that he will wear it longterm even though he doesn’t necessarily want to. I know him very well (I mean…I’m marrying the guy!) and am secure enough in our relationship that even if he decided to never wear his ring, it wouldn’t be an issue for us because I trust him. And, if it’s not an issue fo us, it definitely shouldn’t be an issue for any outsdiers looking into the relationship!

Post # 23
Member
215 posts
Helper bee

I would be unhappy if my Fiance didn’t want to wear his ring after we were married, but if other people are ok with it in their relationship, that’s their business.

Post # 24
Member
354 posts
Helper bee

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Kimbalina81:  A man who doesn’t want to wear his wedding band (without an understandable reason for that) is a man who doesn’t want to show he’s married. It’s as simple as that.My two cents.

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 5 months ago by framarianna.
Post # 25
Member
337 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

Neither of my parents wear their wedding bands. In fact, I have both of them that I wear on a necklace. My mom just hates how rings feel period. And my dad has other rings, but I think he wanted to match my mom. Lol. However, I really do kind of want that ring on my FI’s finger and he is so proud to do so.

Post # 26
Member
1383 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: Disneyland - January 2016

It really depends I guess. Personally, I DON’T want Fiance to wear his ring all that much because of his job and I have a feeling it’s going to get banged up pretty easily, plus I feel like it’s a hazard. He disagrees and wants to wear it all the time.

Some men do a lot of yardwork or construction around the house on the weekend, so even if their job isn’t too rough on the ring, they might still not want to wear it because of that. Some men don’t like jewelry. Some men lose things extremely easily. There’s a slew of reasons some men choose to not wear their ring and I think so long as they communicate this reason with their spouse, then it’s not a big deal.

Post # 27
Member
8067 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

My DH forgets his all the time.  He takes it off to play with it out of habit and inevitably leaves it somewhere to be found days later.  He’s never worn a ring in his life before.

I guess it doesn’t bother me.  He’s married, a ring doesn’t change anything.  It’s not like he’s gonna go out and pick up ladies just because he’s not wearing it.  Meh.

Post # 28
Member
7111 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I have to admit that I’m blown away by the number of bees that assume that not wanting to wear a wedding ring must mean doesn’t want to admit they’re married and must want to cheat all the time. That seems like a ridiculous jump to me. People in are committed, monogomous relationships before they’re married and somehow manage to act like they’re in a relationship without jewelry.

Personally, both my husband and I wear our rings almost all the time. We both like them. But I wouldn’t have any problem if he didn’t want to wear his ring. It’s just jewelry. Neither of his parents wear their wedding rings. And they’ve been married 35+ years. 

Cheating is wrong. Hiding the fact that you’re married is wrong. Being ashamed to be married is wrong. But you can do (or not do) all those things regardless of whether or not you wear a ring regularly. 

Post # 29
Member
8067 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

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Robyn0214:  Oh yeah, I’ve seen people cheat with wedding rings on as well.  Like a ring is going to stop someone!!

Post # 30
Member
2655 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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Kimbalina81:  My DH never wears his wedding band, like ever. He will on occasion,like if we are getting dressed up to go out- but he doesnt wear it at work ( liability) and rarely wears it when we go out casually. 

I am not offended nor do I care…If i was that insecure that he couldnt walk out of the house with a giant symbol of his ‘taken status’ , we would have larger problems to deal with lol. 

 

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 5 months ago by Boxerlover24.

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