(Closed) Men who just knew from the start that you were "the one", and who moved fast

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 31
589 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Scottish Rite Cathedral (New Castle, PA)

sosojamie:  My Darling Husband and I met online, we talked for a couple weeks, met up in person and after two months of dating he told his mom he was going to marry me. She was kind of taken aback and suggested a long engagement haha. We bought a house and moved in together after 6 months of dating, he proposed after 8 months of dating and we were married a year later. It was a whirlwind but never had a doubt!

Post # 32
1652 posts
Bumble bee

WE talked about getting married months after we met, we now have been dating 1 1/2 years 

We will  prob get married in a couple years, I dont like rushing into things since we have other things to get in order.   I believe waiting for a few years is best.

Post # 33
407 posts
Helper bee

Fiance and I wrote to each other long distance for five months to get to know each other since we met through finding each other’s blogs. We scribbled up novel-length emails to one another, and wrote everyday. Finally, I drove up to meet him in person. He asked me to be his girlfriend on our second date in a bookstore. One month and two weeks after we officially started dating, he wrapped his arms around me and whispered in my ear that he wanted to move to my city (five hours away) and then marry me. The fact that I wasn’t totally freaked out about this was amazing. One of my best friends and only other real boyfriend had both expressed the desire to get married, and during both of those moment, I near panic attacks because I was so scared and knew it wasn’t right. Fiance was so different with his determination though – not possessive or desperate – but rather, he just knew. I did too.

He moved to my city and  propsed after seven months (he wanted to propose after five!), and we’re getting married in another five. In all, our non-married relationship will only be a year. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Post # 34
854 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

My fiance and I met in a bar on May 9 2014.

In June he told me that he was going to marry me ( I thought he was just being cute..).

In July I had a serious talk with him and told him that if we weren’t headed towards marriage at 12 months then I wanted him to end it (we had both been in VERY long relationships that did not result in marriage and I was not going to do that again…).

My lease was going to expire in May 2015, he wanted me to move in with him and I told him not without committment (see prior reasoning) and on April 9, 2015 he proposed. He says he knew from the beginning. I was gun shy due to my last relationship but he convinced me… And we will live happily ever after!

Post # 35
506 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

My husband has been my best friends for years. We have known each other for the last 9 years. I knew what he wanted for his life but I did not shared his views before. When we were finally single in the same time we started seeing each other more often and when I felt I was ready I made a move. This was May 22nd 2013. We started talking about marriage in October, moved in together in November, got engaged close to our one year mark on May 19th 2014 and got married May 23rd 2015, the day after our 2 years anniversary. 

It evolved quickly but we both knew each other so well and we knew what we were getting ourselves into so it made sense for us. Nobody in our entourage said it was quick or anything. Nothing has ever felt so right 🙂

Post # 36
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

This is me and my SO! We met in August and he took me ring shopping last week and I thought it would happen this month but he said that wouldn’t be surprising enough and hinted at August being the time. We’re both juniors in college and for sure aren’t getting married until after he graduates (I’m a semester ahead) and maybe not for a while after that so we can save up more. I knew I was marrying him after our first date and he knew on our third. We talked about it like two months into dating too! We’re going in similar career directions and have similar goals so we’re very excited to grow as individuals and as a couple together  

Post # 37
787 posts
Busy bee

sosojamie:  We knew each other for 10 years before we started dating and because of that,  he knew within weeks he wanted to marry me. A month after dating,  he proposed in his garage with a hose clamp in place of an engagement ring. 

Post # 38
742 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

My fiance and I met in 2007 when I had started college.  After a semester of a class together, he flat out said, “One day, I’m going to marry you.” After a few years of him dating another girl and me dating my highschool sweetheart, we finally reconnected.

In short, here we are about 8 years after he said it getting ready to get married! 

Post # 39
654 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

I met my Fiance through a mutual friend while I was already in a relationship.  We only met once, but got along fine and kept in touch on a basic level through FB.  My ex and I broke up for unrelated reasons, and about 3 months later I saw my Fiance again at a birthday dinner for another mutual friend.  My friend was asking how things were going with the guy, and I told him we broke up.  My Fiance overheard and did a double take.  He looked at me and said “wait, so you’re single now?  OK” with a ominously determined smile.  He very obviously flirted with me all night, not cheesy just obvious.  Offered to pick me up at the door and drive me to the bar we were all going to next, etc.  We moved in together after 3 months dating, and ring shopped after 9 months.  We knew practically the whole relationship we were getting married.  He proposed at one year exactly, about ten minutes after midnight.  We’ll be married this Nov., about 1.5yrs total after we started dating and roughly 2.5yrs after meeting the first time.

Post # 40
887 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

Annonnie89:  I was thinking the same thing. It’s interesting that ‘falling in love too quickly’ was mentioned frequently as a ‘red flag’ on another thread. 

I think the main take away is that while falling in love at first sight is possible, you should still proceed with caution. I would want to know someone for at least a year before tying the knot. 



Post # 41
362 posts
Helper bee

Annonnie89:  Excellent point…

Not saying whirlwind romances don’t happen and that they can’t work in the long-run, just that it’s definitely a toss-up. One of my best friends got engaged to a guy she had casually known all throughout college after a MONTH and they’re one of the healthiest couples I know… and then on the other hand, my sister met a guy who seemed perfect for her (even though he was the first guy she’d ever seriously dated), they were married within a year of meeting and divorced about a year after that and short-selling their house. He was “perfect” right up until they were living together and he started pushing her around, making bad decisions with their money… and then she discovered all of his child porn, so yeah…

I’m open-minded/optimistic but at the same time wary of those sort of situations until all the shoes have dropped, if that makes sense.

Also, and this is one of my biggest pet peeves EVER:

If you met the right guy at that right time when you both all had your ducks in a row and everything “just fell into place” and everything was “so easy,” great. Seriously. That is wonderful for you and I mean it… but don’t be one of those people that then gets on a high-horse and looks down on everybody else’s relationship just because they’ve had trials & tribulations or where on different pages about certain things, needed counseling for this or that, etc. 

Fairytales are awesome if you luck into one, but hard-earned relationships are really precious and deserve some applause too.

Post # 42
2456 posts
Buzzing bee

My mother and father met and married in less than 2 months.

She kept a diary of the experience, and there was absolutely no doubt that it was meant, and they felt equally about one another from their first meeting. She as 30 and he was 33.

Married until his death, 39 years later. 

Post # 43
2156 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Oh and to add a little more to my story, the first time I met my Mother-In-Law my Darling Husband had already told her we were buying a house together (after 2 months of dating..).. She gently tried to put us off/slow us down when we met her but after she saw we were serious I was very quickly accepted into their family (and my Darling Husband was accepted into my family immediately as well) and when we got engaged both our mothers cried tears of joy.. 

I definitely don’t think our marriage is any more special than anyone’s marriage after 10 years of dating, I just think different things work for different people and our whirlwind romance was exactly right for us. 

Post # 44
112 posts
Blushing bee

I started dating my (now) husband in April 2012 and he proposed just 5 months later. We had moved in together and started talking about getting married at around 2 months. He had the ring made and asked my father (who surprisingly agreed to this very quick proposal). His plan was to wait until February to propose (we started dating on his birthday and he was going to propose on mine) but once he had the ring he said he just couldn’t wait! 

I always ask him how he knew he wanted to marry me so quickly since he had dated his previously girlfriend for over two years and never discussed marriage with her. I was in the same boat having dated my previous boyfriend for three-ish years. There is no other way to describe it then it just felt right. Our relationship was (and still is) so easy, fun-filled and loving. We have been married now for about a year and half, got our first dog, bought a house and will be trying for our first child soon. 

My husbands parents also got engaged and marriage quickly. I think they were engaged in 3 weeks and married a few months later. They have been married for over 30 years now!

Post # 45
2156 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Annonnie89:  Yes, that’s definitely true. I think getting married fairly quickly is fine but you need to be really realistic about what you’re looking for in a partner, be very aware that you’re blinded by ”being in love” and make sure you think it through extremely rationally, as in, even make a list of what you need in a marriage, what is non-negotiable for you (from having children to having someone who washes the dishes), and that you communicate all of your wants and needs to your SO. My Darling Husband and I had a LOT of discussions about our expectations, our hopes and dreams for the future (from where we want to retire to what kind of dog we want in our old age), as well as what kind of things we expect from each other on a day to day basis (hugging in bed, making each other cups of tea.. )… this relationship is actually one of the most rational and communication-based relationship I’ve ever had, unlike some of my previous ”’lovey-dovey-I-can’t-live-without-you” relationships. 

Someone I know summed it up perfectly – You marry the right person because you know that you can live without them, you would just really prefer not to. 

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