(Closed) Mexican and Chinese Wedding – need tips from Asian brides.

posted 7 years ago in Intercultural
Post # 3
Member
2142 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I’ve seen you post a couple times about this. Have you talked to your Fiance about this? I mean what if he does not want a Asian-fy wedding here in the States? Just a thought.

I don’t know where you are but unless you live near a big Chinatown lion dancers troupes are hard to find and quite pricey. I looked into them for our wedding and unfortunately the budget did not allow it.

Are you guys doing a tea ceremony when you are in China? Ask him how he feels about doing it for the relatives that are here. Does he have any relatives that are here in the States?

I would honestly stay away from the Chinese Take out Boxes, they aren’t really very true to culture.

And please don’t be offended but it’s QiPao or Cheongsam or Qua (for the 2 piece) but not Quiapo.

Post # 5
Member
9 posts
Newbee

I want to start off by telling you how adorable you are and how I think it’s soo sweet that you’re actually trying to be “more Asian”. lol

I’m Asian and I would never incorporate such influences into it unless my Fiance’s family asked and he asked me to do so.

Red & Gold are two major colors in the culture and is supposed to bring “luck” and “wealth” and Chinese fireworks are a very festive touch. China sells these fireworks left and right, and any Chinatown should have it too : http://www.buzzle.com/articles/ancient-chinese-fireworks-invention-history.html

I, too agree– you should remove the Chinese take-out box thing because it’s stereotypical, and might even be insulting. I understand that there’s humor to it, and it’s cutesy and fun but I don’t think that’s how the family would perceive it. I’d avoid something like that to play it safe.

And if no lion dancers, traditional chinese dancers will do:) 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6N1j-MwDxRs

 

Keep in mind your money converted into Chinese currency will go further, and you could get more for it, so look into your options for entertainment in China. Also, paper lanterns, and a parasol might be cute to add to the ambiance & your look:) hahaha! or drinks with little parasol picks in them.. Just ideas. I hope this makes it more fun, even if you don’t go with any of these ideas. If you do, keep in touch and let me know how it goes!!!!!:)

Post # 6
Member
822 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

At my brother’s wedding, they added many Chinese touches: lion dancers, the color red, tea ceremony (but I assume you will do this in China), invites had double happiness symbol, red qipao, red envelopes…the groom can also bring your family gifts wrapped in red cellophane/tissue.  depending on where he’s from, the gifts can range from whole pig, roast, pig, mandarins, various peanut or sesame candies…also give out gifts to family and vendors using the little red envelopes. 

when i went to another wedding a few weeks earlier, the bride was from china but the only chinese element she chose to include was the chopstick favors.  Everything else was very Western.  She never changed out of her long white dress.

Post # 9
Member
2750 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’m going to caution you against incorporating TOO many touches.  They want a western wedding.  Really, they do.

I am Asian, but I was born Canadian.  Even I felt superficial when it came to trying to include “asian touches” to my western wedding.  I’ve scrapped most of the ideas.  I talked to my mother about it and she validated that the Asian side of the family prefers to see a western wedding.

I even went to try on qipaos but my mother said that her friends would know right off the bat if that style/fabric/make was cheap quality or not.  I did not to door games, no tea ceremony, no chinese favors, no qipao. 

Please be authentic to you and your fiance.  Incorporate some Mexican and Chinese touches (decor or something), but don’t over do it or it will end up looking very superficial.

Post # 10
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

It’s really sweet that you want to incorporate so much of your FI’s culture into your own. I would have to agree with PP and wonder if he would be happy with these surprises. My Fiance and I are both chinese and are having a completely western wedding. I feel guilty about this and often ask him if we can do a tea ceremony or incorporate red SOME how into our wedding, but he always says NO. So even though your Fiance is Chinese, he may not embrace these traditions.

I also hate to ask, but how are you honoring your own Mexican Culture? I hope you are having a good balance of the two cultures.

Post # 12
Member
2750 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@NatashasNovember: I hope you know your limit then, it’s a good thing you caught the take-out boxes thing.  Actually, I hated the qipao, and none of the siblings in my mother’s generation wore them either. Moderation is key.  But as PPs have said, I’d be interested in knowing how you would incorporate your Mexican heritage as well. 

And yes, you can be superficial to your own culture (doing traditions and “touches” without considering their symbolism, purpose or origin). That is probably why it is best you ask Fiance for his opinion.  If in doubt, ask his mother too! 

Post # 14
Member
328 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

double happiness! That is super asian and super chinese.

I’m having a western wedding, but as a nod to my heritage, I am going to sprinkle it around the decorations.

try googling tea ceremony—we’re doing a small version at our wedding…that is, we’re only doing parents and grandparents, skipping the extended family.

Post # 15
Member
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@NatashasNovember: glad to hear you are honoring both cultures. It sounds like a very festive wedding with mariachis and lion dancers!

Post # 16
Member
560 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Thanks for this post! I’m Caucasian American and marrying a Chinese Canadian and I want to add some Chinese touches, too. Everyone in my family keeps asking what I’m going to include from his culture, lol.

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