(Closed) MIL Didn't show up to bridal shower…

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 17
9 posts
  • Wedding: November 1999


I am sorry, this situation sucks and I know because this happened to me. My DH’s family was pretty horrible before my wedding because they hated me…for no reason. DH’s two aunts RSVP’d one yes, one no. SIL and Mother-In-Law did not respond and my mom called and asked if they were coming the day before the shower. Mother-In-Law said no. Needless to say his aunt that RSVP’d yes never showed or called/emailed to change her RSVP. Nice.

My DH said for me to forget about it too, and that he had been dealing with this stuff since he was little. Lonnnng story short, no one from his family was invited to our wedding (his choice). It sucked because although that day was perfect, I know a piece of my DH’s heart was sad and really I was too. I love family.

We have since reconciled, and my Mother-In-Law actually said she was sorry and that she judged me before she even knew me. She tells me on an almost daily basis how much she loves me, and that I was the best thing to ever happen to her family. 

All I can say, is hopefully good will come from the situation eventually, but in the meantime try to let your Fiance deal with his family the way he wants to. I supported DH but stayed out of his family’s drama. He made all of the decisions (and still does, we don’t talk to BIL&SIL still) when it came to his family. You have my sympathies, dealing with this drama before the wedding is not fun.

Post # 18
7571 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@Spud8610:  Are you sure Future Mother-In-Law recieved the invite? Did anyone chase up the RSVP’s for the shower? Maybe your Future Mother-In-Law did not receive her invite and the rest of the IL’s stayed away out of loyality to your Future Mother-In-Law. It may have looked like you purposefully didn’t invite her.

As for the wedding and rehearsal, the only people obligated to pay for your wedding are you and your Fiance.

Post # 19
7571 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

DBLE post

Post # 20
169 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Super rude to not RSVP or show up.  I had similar issues prior to our engagement with my fiances mother.  I think he needs to sit down with her and tell her expectations of his in reguards to how she needs to treat you.  If no one tell her that her behavior is unacceptable how is she to change if she considers it normal?  When we had this talk it helped quite a bit.  My mother in law has become much more active in it all since.

Post # 22
3683 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Ok, super rude of them.


I also think you guys should have your rehearsal dinner elsewhere.  These people can’t be relied upon, and they shouldn’t host something they don’t want to host.

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