(Closed) MIL driving me crazy!!

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
294 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

Lol. There is just something about MILs! They seem to be a special breed…

Just remember to breathe and it may be best if you and your fiance talk and decide on how to handle both of your parents. 

We agreed that if there were problems with one of our parents we would tell each other, and the child of the parent that one of us is having a problem with would need to talk to them to fix the problem. Or in some cases tell them to not bring certain things up or tell you what you should do in your relationship.

It may be best if the two of you talk and make sure she understands that certain things need to be done by a certain time, and if she is late telling you something or forgets something, tough. Its your wedding and you shouldn’t be so stressed out.(p.s. not meaning that to come across as harsh, she just needs to understand there are boundaries)

Hope it helps and one other thing to remember…. you are not the only bride with problems with Mother-In-Law

Post # 4
Member
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

My Future Mother-In-Law does everything but wipe my FI’s a**.  I feel your pain.  I told him that it is time to leave the nest.  He’s an encore groom and you would think the first wife would’ve stopped that.  Maybe it is something about the fact that he got divorced and Future Mother-In-Law felt like she had to step back in.  Who knows but it is annoying.

Post # 5
Member
796 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

My Future Mother-In-Law is the same way – this wedding is all about her and her family coming to visit. When I made the seating chart, she said she didn’t need to sit at the table with all the parents and grandparents, she wants to be close to her brothers and sisters. When my fiancee (her son!) scheduled a golf tournament the morning of the wedding, she scheduled another event for her family (my family wasn’t invited) because she didn’t think they would want to golf. My mom invited a bunch of ladies (bridesmaids, aunts, grandmoms) to get manicures the day before the wedding, she didn’t want to come.

When there is a big party like a wedding, I think everyone wants to make it about them – maybe not consciously, but they want out of it what they want. To the bride, that sometimes seems crazy. Maybe she will go back to her normal, only semi-crazy self after the wedding!?

Post # 6
Member
5 posts
Newbee

Wow…isn’t it all so much fun? My mom is the same way and it drives my man crazy! She is pretending that she has to go to a therapist because we are getting married! She also has her friends send me emails so she can see how I respond to them…last time she did this, she accused my fiance of writing back because it wasn’t my writing style. I hope your Mother-In-Law gets better before the big day because she is being really unfair and disrespectful to you! I’m so sorry you have to deal with all of this!

Post # 8
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Ack, hugs to you all with the horrible MIL’s! My father’s mom was horrible to my mom. She’s racist, and my mom is half korean. Yes, half korean. She actually gave my mother USED sik pantyhose as a Christmas gift one year…just weird stuff! Hopefully it’s just the wedding bringing this all out!

Post # 9
Member
1238 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I’m so sorry you are dealing with this.  From all of the posts I’ve read on  weddingbee it seems like mil issues are pretty big with most brides.  She has no idea she is being unreasonable because she only sees things from her own pov.  Your fh needs to sit down with her and explain things from your (meaning you and your fh’s) pov.  I don’t think she will cause  scene at your wedding or reception.  Once the actual day is there people have a tendency to finally "get it" and let it be the couples day. 

Good luck!

Post # 10
Member
695 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Just hugs…my Mother-In-Law is going to be a pain, especially when we have kids, but nothing like this or any of the stories I read here or on an etiquette board I frequent. I don’t know how you ladies handle it 🙁

Post # 11
Member
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

What is up with MILs?  Irishgirl I feel your pain. Mine is a pain the butt but she has gotten better. When my fiance and I first got engaged she was devastated and didn’t like it at all .  I guess she’s gotten over it and has accepted me but she still has her moments.  She just annoys the crap out of me and always wants attention.  She really thinks the world should revolve around her.   

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