(Closed) MIL has/(had?) shingles, wants to see baby

posted 4 years ago in Babies
Post # 2
915 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

Have you Mother-In-Law get a doctor’s note, it’s really not that hard – let the medical professional be the bad guy. 


“Hey Mother-In-Law we really hope to see you but because we don’t want to expose Baby to Shingles before we can confirm arrangements we need for you to see the doctor and be cleared of Shingles and OK’D to be around Baby”

Post # 3
4227 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom

I personally don’t know if I’d be comfortable with a visit. I agree with 

View original reply
unfettering :  though on the doctor note idea, one way or another it’ll settle it 🙂

Post # 4
8947 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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pearlrose :  Her doctor says it’s fine, your doctor says it’s fine. I would take them at their word. Good instincts and good call cancelling the T-day plans, but I think at this point with medical professionals saying it’s fine, I’d probably let the grieving woman see her grandbaby.

Post # 5
1169 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Both doctors have said it’s fine so I have to agree with the poster above me.

Post # 6
218 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

If your pediatrician says it’s fine then I think you should allow a visit. Just have mother in law wear gloves and long sleeves/ a mask as a precaution. 

Post # 7
2699 posts
Sugar bee

No. I wouldn’t care what the docs said. No visit for a few weeks. Your ped said it was unlikely, not impossible and then followed with IF the baby started showing symptoms… That to me = hell naw. HER doc told her she didn’t have shingles and she did end up having it. That to me = hell naw. No guessing or oopsies, guess we were wrong about that one with a 3-month old. She can wait a few weeks and she should be as concerned about the baby catching it as you are. 

Post # 8
9082 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

If she doesn’t have the shingles blisters (I’ve had shingles, I did not have the blisters), she is non-contaigous.

Post # 9
47386 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It used to be thought that shingles virus was only shed in the fluid of the blisters, however the virus has also been found in saliva and nasal secretions. Transmitting the virus other than by direct contact with the fluid from the lesions is rare, but not impossible.

That is why your doctor is saying that your daughter “probably” has some immunity and is “unlikely” to get it. They are not comfortable giving you a 100% guarantee.

Post # 10
9406 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

Do what feels right to you.  You know there is a very small risk, and it’s up to you to decide if it’s a risk worth taking.  Choosing not to let her see Mother-In-Law is more likely to lead to trouble, but the trouble will be a much lower grade issue.  It’s sort of up to you to feel out how you weigh the two options.  Rock and a hard place, you know?

In the end, whatever you decide, it is you and your husband who will need to live with and deal with any negative outcome should one arise.  Grandma and baby may be affected, but ultimately guilt-less.

All I’m saying is.. don’t feel bad for following your mama bear instincts on this one.

Post # 11
7426 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

No way. Call me overly cautious, but I would wait a few more weeks. It’s not worth the risk.

Post # 12
11518 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

I’m with you – I’d be paranoid too.

That said, if both doctors are saying it’s okay, then it’s probably okay.  You can always ask her to wash her hands before holding the baby and ask her not to kiss the baby.  I feel like that might be a compromise?

Post # 13
6414 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
pearlrose :  Heck no.  Shingles is dangerous to young babies, or at least that’s what I was told by my doctor.  A co worker of mine came in and had it around her eye as well, and VERY VERY IRRESPONSIBILY was rubbing her eyes and touching things while she was work.  I had lysol wipes everywhere to help mitigate her from spreading it to people.  Becuase she’d sometimes touch her eyes and then a person.

Post # 14
3900 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

Yeah… NO.I would wait a few weeks longer. 

Post # 15
4813 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

View original reply
pearlrose :  I’d wait – even if the chances are small that your baby would be infected, the possible risk is large.  Personally it would not be worth the risk.  Everyone involved would feel terrible if there was a bad outcome.  

The topic ‘MIL has/(had?) shingles, wants to see baby’ is closed to new replies.

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