- 8 years ago
- Wedding: June 2011
Hi! OK I’m probably going to sound really whiney here, but I need to vent/get advice. I LOVE my Future Mother-In-Law. She’s wonderful. She is an event planner, which is really convenient while planning a wedding! However, we went to visit our venue last night (she, for the first time) to get ideas for decorating and… while I am thrilled with the ideas she had, I am also a little torn because she has EXPENSIVE taste. I am talking… the flower ideas she had would probably cost me no less than $15,000.
Now my family is as “middle class” as they come and this is just absolutely out of the question. She has always been very privileged and doesn’t really seem to understand that staying within our (very small, unforgiving) budget is crucial. She is very generous, and has implied on several occasions that they intend to help us out with wedding expenses (My parents are footing the bill on things like the food and my dress, but Fiance and I will be covering things that we want to go a little overboard on–expensive photog & DJ).
So, I have two dilemmas. 1st Dilemma: Do I a. Tell her to come up with less-extravagant decor plans since we cannot afford what she wants or do we b. ask her to help us out with paying for these things — obviously I will not ask, but could have my fiance state our case. 2nd Dilemma: I really don’t want my parents to feel bad or like what they’re doing isn’t enough. I definitely don’t want to hurt their feelings. It seems like me running to my in-laws to pay for the stuff my parents cannot afford might just be downright offensive.
What to do, what to do…