(Closed) MIL Sat in Brides Chair at Sweetheart Table

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
5890 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

she only sat in your chair during the one dance?  sorry, but i don’t see what the big deal is….added to the fact that this was a year ago, i think it is time to let this go.

Post # 4
Member
5787 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I don’t think this is anything to worry about a year later. Whats done is done

Post # 6
Member
1137 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

when i read the title to this post i assumed you would be posting about the fact you mil waltz into the reception room and sat in you seat…. now i wouldn’t let that go but this i would. i really do not see the harm in your mil stealing a few moments from her son, it’s an important day to her too, she my have just seen it as a good oportunity to speak with him. 

Post # 7
Member
526 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

She probably just wanted to continue enjoying her son’s special day with him.  I seriously doubt she meant any disrespect towards you, unless she later refused to give up the chair and threw your bouquet. 

Post # 9
Member
132 posts
Blushing bee

This seems like a non-issue to me.  It’s not like she was trying to draw attention away from you.  She just sat in a seat next to her son.  And it happened a year ago?  I say let it go. 

Post # 10
Member
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

Well she is obviously very attached to her son and that would be the ONLY moment the whole day that she could spend time alone with her son without you there.  I’m not sure that it’s something you should feel insulted or offended over.  Your Darling Husband probably wasn’t going to be looking wistfully at you and your dad dancing anyway.  And if he was, I’m sure he was able to ignore his mom long enough to catch a moment of you with your dad.  It sounds like you had a timultuous relationship to say the least, so be grateful she only bothered your Darling Husband while you were dancing and not with you sitting right there.  🙂

Post # 11
Member
46373 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I am not aware of any rule that says no one else sits in the bride’s chair. That would mean that all evening whenever you were away from the table dancing, visiting or in the ladies room, your husband would be required to sit by himself or get up and leave the table. No one could stop by his table and chat.

Are you sure you aren’t magnifying the importance of her sitting in your chair because of  other issues?

Post # 12
Member
1077 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@mollylovesit:  Be happy that your Darling Husband had a moment with his mom while you were having one w/ your dad.  A sweet heart table isn’t like the queen’s throne.  It’s a just table where her son happened to be sitting alone for a bit.

Post # 14
Member
350 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

$100000000 says my Future Mother-In-Law does this too.  In fact, I could see her running over and “stealing my seat” every time I get out of my chair.  She has a hard time not being the only woman in my FI’s life anymore.  I can relate.

Post # 16
Member
350 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@mollylovesit: Yeah, people who have normal MIL’s can’t understand how incredibly annoying this stuff gets after a while!  For me anyway, it’s been a series of these stupid little boundary breaches.  It’s subtle enough that people can take each incident out of context individually and think you’re just overreacting.  It’s a part of a bigger ongoing issue, though!

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