- 4 years ago
- Wedding: September 2015
Things are getting more and more interesting.
So last night I was on my mini runaway from home, I stayed around DH’s work place until he’s off (8pm) so I don’t have to awkwardly stay around Mother-In-Law.
Then DH and I probably had the biggest fight ever. He said he couldn’t believe I could be this rude to his mother. I told him that mil is crossing my personal boundary and it’s important to let her know that all the things she’s been doing were very inappropriate.
DH said it’s not inappropriate at all because it’s his mother…He basically told me that if I cronfronted Mother-In-Law then this relationship is over.(Because Mother-In-Law cannot handle a normal adult conversation and would take everything towards her. Then ask DH to leave me.) He also blamed me for being overly dramatic.
now I’m starting to question my marriage.
If your husband is normally rational, I would chalk this up to stress and drop it FOR NOW- but when Mother-In-Law leaves, you guys need to sit down and hash this out…and figure out a gameplan for next time.
WTF did I just read? This is seriously a messed up situation. That is incredibly rude not only to invite yourself into someones home, but to go through your stuff and not only judge but pick out things you want to keep??? I don’t care who you are or how close you are to me or to Fiance, I would not stand for it! Personal space and personal belongings need to be respected
What the f***kk? “It’s not inappropriate because it his mother” umm yeah well then how about your mother come over and go through all of his stuff. Tell him to enjoy his time with his mommy while you go elsewhere where you have privacy and are not disrespected. “how rude”
Wow. I’m sorry he responded in such a way. On that note I’d totally just tell him I’ll be staying with a friend until she is gone, because it’s not worth you being forced to be uncomfortable for who knows how long and him be ok with it. Hopefully absence will make the heart grow fonder? Still meet with him for lunches, dinners, etc… Don’t shut HIM out to avoid making it worse, but do refuse to be bossed about in your own home
What’s inappropriate is the way his mother is treating you and the way he’s allowing it to happen.
I’d suggest counseling asap since this has escalated to the point of threats to your marriage, even if she leaves soon. This is all so unacceptable.
I agree that he’s stressed, but that is no excuse for the way he’s allowing the mother to walk all over them both, especially his wife. The situation is absurd.
I’m sorry but Fuck this lady.
ETA: I just read your last update, whoa. Maybe you should get a hotel for a couple of days, I wouldn’t put up with that kind of disrespect from both of them. You’re his wife and it’s your home together, they both need to understand and respect that. I’m so sorry.
Wow wtf? Is right. I would say counseling stat. What’s that saying? Leave and cleave. You and your husband have made a home together and how you both feel and maybe compromise should be respected by his mother. She sounds very immature.
My mil will be here Saturday. This scares me. Everyone knows she’s crazy though.
I feel like staying elsewhere until your crazy Mother-In-Law leaves is giving her exactly what she wants. And free reign to continue going through your belongings. I think you need to take a stand in your own home, tell Mother-In-Law that her behavior is unacceptable, and inform her that she will be staying in a hotel for the remainder of her visit. She already has your husband siding with her ridiculous behavior and I feel like she’s just going to continue to drive a wedge between the two of you in your absence. If your husband doesn’t like the fact that you are standing up to his mother then he can feel free to join her at the hotel. And I definitely agree with PP’s suggestion of counseling. Your husband’s reaction to the situation is unacceptable. Your marriage should come first and you shouldn’t be made to feel uncomfortable in your own home. I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this situation.
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