Ok, great, thanks for including me 🙂
So, like I’m sure some of you have noticed based on my multitude of “i’m-going-to-fucking-choke-her-out” posts, my mother is a *bit* of a handful. My Fiance has a very sweet and kind mother, and I feel kind of bad he got saddled with mine. I think list format would probably be the best way to detail her Mother-In-Law insanity:
1. The *first time* she met Fiance, we had only been dating a couple of months. Her first questions to him were “so…how nervous were you to meet me?” (she did not like his answer), followed by “when are you having children?”/”when you have children, you’ll understand”, etc. 3ish years in, she is fully aware we are not having kids, yet continues to hound me about it.
2. We have been engaged barely two weeks, and she is unaware that I bought my dress *months* ago. She has not dropped *telling* me what dress I will be wearing: a green, tropical print pageant gown she bought me *4 years and 20lbs ago*. When I explained to her that I will not be wearing it, she said she wanted to talk to Fiance, because “this day is about YOU, not him, and you can wear what you want!” To be clear: I do not want to wear the green gown.
3. Since before we got engaged, she has been demanding to walk me down the aisle, since my father is deceased. She has flown into several rages when I’ve told her (yet again) that Fiance is walking me down…like she’s never heard it before.
4. She is constantly trying to get FIs phone number out of me. Prior to us getting engaged, one such conversation stands out: after telling her nicely she doesnt need his number, she responded “I just want to talk to my son-in-law.” When I replied reminding her that he is not her son-in-law, she said “that is what I want to talk to him about.”
5. Along the same lines as #4, several times a week she texts or calls asking when Fiance is going to a) take her out to lunch b) bring her flowers c) call her and “kiss up to his mother-in-law.” I advised that she should not hold her breath.