(Closed) MIL wants to discuss new baby expectations…

posted 5 years ago in Babies
Post # 16
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

LadySmurph:  That’s exactly what I was referring to, I’m so sorry that happened to you.

Post # 17
7851 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

What I found helpful was to not have to take the baby to the store- when I grocery shopped or ran errands. I loved having 45 minutes to myself! Your Mother-In-Law would probably enjoy watching your baby and you might like the break.

Post # 18
2473 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

missjewels:  I 100% agree and that’s basically my plan! No one gets notified until the baby is born (mainly because “labor” can take days from when it starts and I don’t need our parents calling and texting every 5 seconds for updates) 

no one comes to the hospital until I’m ready, the first few days at home I want just us 3….. And from there spread out visits (not every single flippin day). 

Darling Husband is on board… but saying it and following through when you’ve got pushy European parents  banging on your door when your physically and emotionally drained is another! 

I understand what your saying about help… Your not saying “come and clean my house” all you want is that there are going to be times when your not in the mood, or have the time for “company” to just come and sit around expecting to be waited on! If you wanna come over? well today isn’t great for visiting but if you reeeeeally want to and are up for it then I need some help! 

I know some bees will say most people won’t expect it (be hosted) but I can verify that there are a surprising amount of people who do because they are just daft! So yes…. if someone wants to come over so badly even after I said it’s not a great time….. Then be prepared to help out…. If you wanna sit around and be in the way or just lounge… Then sorry we’ll have to do another day! (I say this having a Father-In-Law who basically thinks all women should be waiting on him like a servant and I don’t think that will change when a baby comes) 

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 5 months ago by  shanbp.
Post # 19
1152 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I honestly would stay out of it and probably would allow them to come if they wanted to.  It’s not worth causing bad blood over.  My Mother-In-Law is similar, but I will likely tell her that she can come visit in the hospital, and if I’m exhausted, honstly I will probably just tell her that and say I need a break (and ask hubby to deal with the rest).  With respect to visiting- no stipulations up front, but when they come over, just ask “hey, do you mind holding the baby while I shower?”  Or, “do you mind holding the baby while I do some housework (if they are decent people they will probably volunteer helping).

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