(Closed) Military custom at reception?

posted 9 years ago in Reception
  • poll: Should I include this ceremony at the reception?
    Include the whole ceremony- spoken : (5 votes)
    26 %
    Include the table, but print out the explanation, not spoken : (13 votes)
    68 %
    Don't include at all : (1 votes)
    5 %
    Other : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    159 posts
    Blushing bee

    sounds like this has a lot of meaning to you, so include it.  it will be one moment of reality in an otherwise fairy tale day.  

    Post # 4
    521 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 1969

    I think it’s kind of depressing–my fiance is in the air force and I think about him getting deployed and it bring tears to my eyes. So I think you could like make the first part and the last part spoken but than put the meanings on the table…

      Like the first paragraph about the table than go into the last about the toast…maybe you can do sparkling grape juice for the toast since it’s a dry reception..

    Post # 5
    5154 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I think it is a nice touch and obviously important to the both of you. I would have it printed though and not spoken. 

    Good luck 

    Post # 6
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    My Fiance spent 15 months deployed and I wouldn’t dare have something like this at our wedding. It’d be really difficult to be reminded of the few friends and comrades he lost on what should otherwise be a happy occassion. They can be honored without a speech, I think. Include an exerpt in the back of your program signifying the empty table. I think a speech is just kinda….super sad and might put a damper on it.

    Post # 7
    332 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2009

    I agree with some previous posters that if it means a lot to you, GO FOR IT! It’s so touching to honor fallen/absent friends/servicemembers. I do think, however, that it would be less depressing and "in your face" to have it unspoken. Have an explanation printed. You could do this several ways: in the ceremony program, on tags on the favors at each placesettings on the table, on one card in the middle of each table–the possibilites are endless.

    Post # 8
    883 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2009

    Espcially if it has meaning to you, its a tradition worth continuing. Just make sure that whoever is saying it is a good speaker and can cheer people up at the end and make them feel a heavy honor instead of depression.

    Post # 9
    815 posts
    Busy bee

    if it means so much to you then include it.  You don’t necessarily have to take time out and go through every bit of the wedding, if you think that will change the mood of the evening.  But it would be a great idea to type this up and put it on the table in a nice frame for everyone to see and to understand.  You can also make note of all the people who aren’t there as part of a speech or as part of a prayer (if you are incorporating religion).

    Post # 10
    4567 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I had no idea this was a military custom, but its beautiful! Like the idea of framing it on the table or including it in the program, but not so much the speech part. Sometimes its more touching to let it be subtle. I have a friend with a huge military family and she’s planning a wedding… wonder if she knows about this!

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