"Mindful moment" during ceremony

posted 2 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 61
3050 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

AORiver15 :  I think at the end of the day this is something you treat as you would in a different religious or cultural ceremony compared to your own. Not saying OP needs to define it as her religion or religion or culture in general. However, you wouldn’t sit through a ceremony of a religion/culture you weren’t closely affiliated to and feel threatened or invonvenienced. Even if you don’t agree or believe in the concept of certain customs, you can still just appreciate someone else’s differences. You also might just take those times to silently reflect on your own religion or customs in a way to still support the bride and groom whether that means praying to a god you worship, think well wishes, or so forth.

If we were talking about a christian ceremony where the pastor requests a moment for all to bow their heads and pray silently, would people still have this same response? Most likely not.

Post # 62
953 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

soymilk :  I completely agree. Which is primarily why I think it’s disappointing that other posters are being so catty about it. But, that’s the internet for you!

Post # 64
33 posts
  • Wedding: August 2016

I’m sorry that you’ve been getting so much negative feedback about your idea. I think that first of all, your wedding should reflect you and your fiancé as a couple, and if taking a moment to quiet your minds from the “go go go” of the wedding day and all of the emotions and anticipation that come with that, you should absolutely do just that. Your guests know you and you know what kind of crowd you’re bringing together. People love a wedding that really “feels” like the couple. 


Our reverend actually worked in a moment like this when we didn’t expect it. Right after “giving the bride away” and we got situated at the front (after the maid of honor fixed my train and veil and all the shuffling was over), he addressed me and my fiancé and told us to take a moment, take a deep breath and look around us at all of our friends and family and take it all in. And we did. And while we took it in, our guests had a second to take in the sight of us standing up there as bride and groom, and it really was a nice moment to settle the nerves of being in front of and audience and the checklists that fly around your mind as a bride who planned it all, when it’s all finally happening. It probably lasted maybe 10 seconds or so (it feels longer when your standing in front of a lot of people), and then he moved on to the welcoming statement and thanked our guests for coming on our behalf and began the ceremony. 


In our opinion, it was a great moment to start off with, and certainly didn’t feel out of place. If anything it made the ceremony feel less stuffy. And honestly, when I think back on our ceremony, I do have visions of looking out and seeing my parents, my best friends and my cousins smiling up at me waiting to watch me get married. I probably wouldn’t have specifically looked out at the crowd and taken all that in if I hadn’t been prompted to. I spent the rest of the ceremony looking into the eyes of my fiancé. 

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