(Closed) Miscarriage remembrance? Help!

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 18
595 posts
Busy bee

Like other people said, you know her better than we would so you would be the one to know whether she’d appreciate it. I can see how some people may not want to be reminded of it at all, ever, because the thought of it will only bring hurt and sadness. Meanwhile others might be more spiritual about it and would like to always remember and have a special memory of the joy they once had but lost. Either way it is a very sincere gesture and it is sweet you show you care.

Post # 19
9252 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I’ve had a miscarriage, and personally would not want it brought up to me at Christmastime. It sounds like you’ve already decided to send the ornament, so that’s no longer a question, but I really hope you’ll consider not mentioning or even alluding to the miscarriage in your note. The “season of hope” message is meaningful enough that if they “want” this type of remembrance, they will immediately recognize that’s what you mean, whereas if they prefer to move on without dwelling on the sadness all season long every year, they can see it as just a thoughtful, pretty ornament.

Post # 20
82 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - The Millennium Center

I’m not sure if this will help you, but my best friend gave birth to a beautiful sleeping girl this past march. She still grieves very much so and has put up a special tree for her daughter, Eden. I would suggest ordering through SarEi on Etsy. She has beautiful hand painted ornaments. I would also suggesfloor her to connect with her local heart-to-heart organization and to “like” Eden’s Wings on Facebook. Eden’s Wings is a non-profit my friend set up that send braclets to mothers who have lost a baby. I hope this helps your friend in her healing process. 

Post # 21
407 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I don’t know about your friend but I wouldn’t want “Season of Hope” during the season where I lost my baby. It wouldn’t be a season of hope; it would be a season of loss. Maybe next year would be better for that. Maybe something in rememberance like an angel or something else that has meaning.

It’s your friend so you know her. Do what you think is best.

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