- 4 years ago
- Wedding: July 2013
Ladies…I could use some support and advice..and please do not think I am crazy.
The good ole’internet has helped me figure this one out. And I know what you are thinking, “webmd only makes you think you have an illness that you dont actually have”…I honestly in my heart think this is different. I am not much of a webmd person and I am usually pretty good at being tuned in to my own body.
Let me start by saying that I suffer from anxiety and in the last few years I have noticed it has gotten worse…or at least in the last few years I have been able to more easily recognize triggers and when I’m having anxiety.I talked to my regular doctor about it and for a few months he had me on anti-depressants (I do tend to get seasonally depressed in the winter), so I took it then he said when I felt better I could ween myself off, so I took ot for few months then I weened off it and I was fine and I havent been on it since then which was about two years ago. It also happened to be a very stressful time in my life so that didnt help.
Well, I have always had issues with the way people eat. It seriously sends me over the edge. I would be sitting in the commons area studying when I was in college and I could hear someone eating chips across a huge room and I would have to get up and leave bc it would totally ruin my focus. I started noticing that a few years ago, well in the last year or so, it has gotten worse. It seriously sends me into a blind rage to hear my mom eat an apple. And she seriously eats an apple every night (I currently live at home with her, only for another month until the wedding)…I am not kidding you, I anticiapte it and the anticpation kills me. I leave my door open cause its usually just her and I who are home with the dogs so I dont see any point in keeping my door closed all the time. So, I hear her do this every night and I go from being a normal happy person, to someone who seriously has rage in my heart. This just happened like ten minutes ago and tears were rolling down my face. I know you think I am crazy but this is serious, it seriously KILLS me to hear this noise.
Other noises, my FI slurps his freaking soup/hot drinks…I want to smack him. He is more conscious of it bc I told him how it freaks me out. I dont have the heart to tell my mom that I am disgusted by her eating an apple. And its not her, I love her to death, she is my best friend and she is beautiful, but seriously, eating disgusts me.
A guy I work with, all day today, made these mouth noises and it kills me. I have read online that this has been associated with emotional/psychiatric issues, I have read its hypercusis, I have read its misophonia….I dont care what the H it is called, I want some help!
Do I go see an ENT? Audiologist? Do I make sure that I tell them I dont need to be instiutionalized? lol. How do I handle this? How do I fix it? How do I feel better???
I read online that someone called it/themselves a “silent sufferer” and its so true bc you serioauly think its so dumb to feel such rage, anxiety and pain and fear over these noises but it is very real…
advice please?? Thanks!
I might also add that my FI is constantly telling me that I dont listen to him but a lot of times I tell him he needs to speak clearer….my grandma is hard of hearing as well…not all noises bother me though. I like when people speak clear and to my face, I cannot hear things well that are muffled. Loud noises dont bother me so much…its just the darn eating and chewing…