Post # 1
I found out yesterday my mom was admitted to the hospital ICU with pneumonia. She is living in a nursing home due to early onset dementia. She has been in the home for a year, and her health has steadily gone down hill.
I just recently got engaged, and have barely begun to plan my wedding. The wedding is not until October. It is my prayer she will still be around for my wedding. I’m having a hard enough time not being able to have her around to help me plan.
I have spent the last three years of my life taking care of my mother. Don’t get me wrong, I love her and I will do anything for her. It’s just that now this is suppose to be such a happy time, and now since another thing has gone wrong it is overshadowing my happiness! I don’t mean to sound selfish. I’m 30 years old, but I feel much older due to having to deal with so much beyond my years the last couple of years.
Thanks for taking the time to read this. I just needed to vent.
Post # 3
@gilmoresgirl: My heart aches for you. You don’t sound selfish at all. Of course it’s natural to want this to be a blissfully happy time in your life.
I’ll be keeping you and your mom in my prayers.
My advice is to try not to feel guilty when you need to take time for yourself and when you need to escape a little to enjoy yourself.
Post # 4
@Evie19: try not to feel guilty when you need to take time for yourself and when you need to escape a little to enjoy yourself. <—- this. This is so important, @gilmoresgirl:. When you are overwhelmed or sad, be sure to take care of you.
I am thinking of you. Sending love and prayers that your mom can be with you on your big day. <3
Post # 5
@soyjoy222: strong second… you do not sound slefish at all. Make sure you are also taking care of yourself and I’m so sorry that you’re having to go through this. Hoping for the best.
Post # 6
I’m there with you. I’ve been taking care of my mom for 3 years as well (mental hospital) and have just started the wedding planning process.
There needs to be support groups for brides without moms. <hugs>
Post # 7
I can’t even begin to imagine how difficult this must be for you. =(
*hugs* Sending good thoughts your way.
Post # 8
I will pray for you and your mom. In this life we have hills and peaks at what always seems to be the right and wrong times. Let the good memories with your mom be your solace and peace. Most importantly know that GOD is with you.
Post # 9
Thank you all for the encouragement! I have a family meeting today regarding her plan of care and what we should do next. I’m thinking about having a small ceremony so she can see at least one of her daughters get married, and then have the actual wedding as already planned. Just in case she is not with us by October 🙁
Post # 10
I don’t really have advice from you I just wanted to say I think you’re incredibly strong for dealing with this. It must be really hard. xxxx
Post # 11
Update: Put my mom on hospice the other day. I’m feeling depressed and emotionally exhausted. I feel so bad for my Fiance, he is being there for me, but at times I lash out at him. I wish I could wake up from this nightmare.
Post # 12
That’s exactly what Fiance is there for. Tell him how much you appreciate him to show him you’re grateful for his support but don’t feel guilty about it.
I’m so sorry you’re in such an emotionally draining situation. You’ve done the only thing you can putting her in a hospice. Try to focus equally on the good things in your life to maintain as positive an atiitude as at all possible. Sometimes life can be shit. I’m not religious but I do think things happen so that we can learn and grow from them. Please know that you’re in people’s prayers xx
Post # 13
@gilmoresgirl: My heart aches for you. Sending hugs and prayers your way…
Please let your Fiance and other friends and family members take care of you during this difficult time. Don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it.
And come back and vent to us anytime…
Post # 14
I am sorry for what you are goin through. I am planning my wedding, and my mom lives 24 hours away. It makes it so much harder when they arent there, Good luck,
Post # 15
Oh no! I am so sorry!
I can’t say I totally get it – but my grandmother is currently in assited living, she keeps falling and she just got to meet my SO. I know he’ll be proposing some time this year, but it would kill me if she didn’t get to the wedding – I’m her youngest grandchild but also the one closest to her/her favourite (seriously, everyone tells me that!). I hope things get better, though!
Post # 16
aw, hugs!! I can’t imagine going through what you are, let alone during my engagement. It’s supposed to be the happiest time of your life, no one will fault you for feeling down. I will be sending prayers your way!!