(Closed) Mixed emotions about my boyfriend? Please help really stressed

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3686 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

How old are you?

Post # 4
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I don’t pretend to know what your problem is really, but I DO know that four months into a relationship is mighty early to be having fights and to be having roller-coaster feelings for someone. Normally at this point you should still be in the Rainbows and Unicorns stage 😉

Post # 7
Member
3686 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

If you’re feeling this way at four months in, that’s not a good sign. Also, if you’re having frequent fights where one of you “storms out,” that’s not a good sign. It sounds like you might need to cut your losses and end this relationship.

Post # 8
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Raveyyy_:  You can’t really force the feelings to be there, whether or not they are actually affected by your past relationship. If there are times you can’t stand to be around him… then I think it’s just a matter of time where you have more days like that then you do loving him… Relationships do have their ups and downs, but to have feelings like that at four months? Doesn’t sound to me like it’ll last. I can’t tell you if you like him or not! Good luck!!!!

Post # 11
Member
3686 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Considering you created an account on an internet wedding forum to ask this question, it’s clear that you know that something isn’t right with your relationship. You’re only 19 — there’s no reason to stay in a relationship that makes you feel this way after only four months. If you had been together for years, I would be more inclined to tell you to try and work it out.

Feeling this way so soon leads me to believe that this relationship isn’t right for you, and staying in it and trying to make it work is probably only wasting time (both yours and his). I’d leave now.

Post # 12
Member
1685 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@cmbr:  +1.  Seriously, when it’s “right,” it’s so right.  Being together and making it work will be as natural as breathing.

Post # 14
Member
2269 posts
Buzzing bee

If this is how you feel after only 4 months together, at the age of 19, I would suggest you leave him.

Post # 15
Member
1177 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

If you don’t want to break it off, you need to ratchet down the drama. Don’t raise your voice. Don’t storm off. Control your irritation and stop saying things you’ll regret. If you’re not mature enough to do those things, there’s not much hope for your relationship long-term, so work on them. Even if your relationship doesn’t last, you need those skills anyway.

Post # 16
Member
1691 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

When I was 21 I got married to a man that I used to have full on blow out fights with. Nothing super abusive, no hitting and not even real name calling, but passionate emotional freak outs.   I thought it was normal, probably because I saw my parents that way as a young child before they split up.  I thought fighting like that meant you cared so much that you got that upset.

Needless to say, that didn’t last, and we were divorced not more than 1.5 yrs later.  I now at 31 am with someone I hardly even argue with, let alone FIGHT with.  This kind of behaviour is NOT normal, storming out and fighting at 4 months?  Definitely should still be in the ‘honeymoon stage’ and shouldn’t evenknow what fighting is.

You are young, you have your whole life ahead of you, why would you waste it on fighitng with someone you barely even know?  Go out and get some life experience, and find out who YOU are, then you can find someone to love you the way you deserve, and someone you can love back properly.

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