Post # 1
So… more or less I am posting this to just vent almost. Not even a vent just sort of put some rationality to my irrationality.
My Darling Husband and I said we would start actively TTC this summer but right now, we are just letting things happen as they happen. And I thought I was completely ok with this…
…except for every time we hit the sheets I am literally beelining it to the bathroom and debating on whether or not I should go get plan b the next day…
…and then in the next week, I’m thinking of baby names and how I would design the nursery and calculating due dates….
…and then a few days later, I’m panicking over the fact that its nearly June. Like hardcore, nearly having panic attacks.
So I told Darling Husband all of this and explained the mixed feelings and that maybe it was better waiting until fall, and I can tell he’s trying so hard to be supportive but he’s also very disappointed. I know he’s looking forward to being a father and I also know that he’s going to be great at it. but bees… I am seriously petrified and excited all at once and I’m beginning to think I’m bipolar on this TTC business.
And all of my girlfriends are just not on the same page I am as they either a.) always wanted children and had no hesitations, or b.) just absolutely DONT want children and I feel like I have no one to really confide in on my extremely mixed emotions. I also feel like I’m letting my Darling Husband down. He’s definitely supportive but absolutely disappointed too.
Post # 3
It is really scary to think about actually having kids some day. It is so much responsibility. I still feel so young sometimes and it’s crazy to think that we are actively TTC. We have been trying for 2+ years now so I’m very ready but every now and then I kind of freak out. I don’t think you can ever really be 100% prepared for being a parent. You don’t know what all to expect until you are there, in the situation. Just try and relax, everything will work out just as it is supposed to. 🙂
Post # 4
Well, maybe you just need more time but I wonder what will be different in the fall vs. the summer…I can’t help but wonder if there’s more than meets the eye, like what exactly concerns you the most? Money? Lifesyle shift?
For me it’s lifestyle shift that scares me the most. I know that life will change as we know it, we won’t be the same little husband wife and cat family ever again.
I panick a little when I see commercials of family life, babies and all the chaos that comes with it. I guess I just have faith It will make me happier than anything to have a child and that I can deal with all the changes.
Perhaps you should think about what worries you most.
Post # 5
You’re not alone! I feel like this also. Sometimes I want a baby desperately and am thinking about nursery themes, names, etc. and other times I freak out about how much our lives will change!
Post # 6
I’m exactly the same way! My husband probably thinks I’m crazy at this point with the back and forth. I’m almost hoping we have an oopsie baby which would be amazing, then I wouldn’t have to fret over it.
Post # 7
@fresitachulita: It’s probably a combination of many things… the responsibility and $ doesnt bother me as much as how much my life will change. I enjoy things like spontaneous weekends away and random nights out with friends. I also enjoy my body the way it is too and perhaps thats the most shallow reason I have but *shrugs* I can’t help my vanity, even if I don’t have a great deal to be vain about ;-p I’m aware of what frightens me, but I dont think it really changes how I feel about it.
@MrsBunnyBear: I’m with you. an “oopsie” would probably be best for me right now. lol!