(Closed) MOB didn't include FI's last name on the wedding website

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
13249 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Can you give an example of how his name was left off?  I’m a bit confused here.

But going off what I think is going on – I think he has every right to be offended, as should his parents.  The wedding is about the two of you – and this makes it all about you and not him.  My parents paid for our wedding, and I was adamant that the invitations went out with my parents as the hosts, but I included his parents names on there, with “FI, son of Mr. and Mrs…” because that’s only fair.

Post # 4
Member
3692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Are you talking about his last name not being in the URL?

On the invitations, for example, your parents have the right to only put their names on it because they are paying and are the hosts.

Post # 5
Member
9916 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

@busybee227:  So go on the website and change it.

Post # 6
Member
203 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I agree with your Fiance.  I don’t like the fact that just because someone is paying for a wedding or a portion of it they feel entitled to have it their way.  In cases like this I would tell them keep their money have a wedding the way I want it even if it’s only me and my FH there.  It’s not about your parents, you two are joining as one and that should include his name on the site as well.  If you feel it’s embarassing then it’s wrong. 

Does your parents not want you to take his last name either?

 

 

Post # 7
Member
3755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

You fix it. It’s your future HUSBAND, he’s the other half of this wedding! This is not a party for your mother! She’s being absolutely unreasonable and quite rude to be honest. I can’t imagine not putting my FI’s full name on our wedding website. 

Post # 8
Member
8593 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’d be pissed too if I was your Fiance. What does the wedding website have to do with your parents paying?! It’s YOUR wedding, not theirs.

Post # 9
Member
2716 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Honestly, I think you need to stand up to your mom on behalf of your Fiance.  I get that “he who pays, gets a say” but you don’t want to set a bad precedence.  It is ridiculous that his name isn’t included on the wedding website.  What about HIS friends and family?  Are you going to be changing your name after the wedding?  It’s one thing to dictate the food or guest list when parents pay, but it’s another to completely ignore the other family.  I definitely think this is a fight worth having.

If she won’t budge, I would seriously consider declining their money and pay for the wedding myself.

Post # 10
Member
1448 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@busybee227:  “Instead of fighting with her, I was complacent and went along with it.”

“I dont’ want to cause any rifts between me and my mom or me and my Fiance, but he feels like I didn’t stand up for him, and my mom is going to continue to push us around for the rest of our lives if I don’t stand up to her.”

Well, to be honest, you didn’t stand up to your mom.  His surname should be included on the wedding website and invitations, because that is part of who he is.

If you mean that his name is not on the URL of the website and the website’s address has already been distributed, there’s not much you can do about that.  But it shouldn’t be hard to change the wording inside the website to include his full name.

This might seem minor, but you really do have to pick which relationship is more important to you.  Do you value your Fiance more in your life, or you mother?  Yes, your mother raised you, but you are not promising to spend the rest of your days with her.

Post # 11
Member
761 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

This sounds a bit odd.  Like they don’t want to acknowledge him or something.  At the end of the day, you’re getting married.  Stand up for your husband.

Post # 12
Member
3000 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

You should be the one making and managing the wedding website since it’s your wedding. Therefore, just go and change it. 

 

Why do you even need to put last names on it? Our last names weren’t on our wedding website at all… they aren’t necessary.

Post # 13
Member
2297 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

don’t they like him? i would just say to my mum, ‘i understand that that is how YOU feel, but Fiance is very upset and feeling excluded. I think it’s really important that he doesn’t feel that way, don’t you? it’s not a big deal, so i’m going to change it.’

and then change it.

The topic ‘MOB didn't include FI's last name on the wedding website’ is closed to new replies.

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