- 5 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
Bees, I need some advice — there is dress drama afoot.
I know that, traditionally speaking, the MoB chooses a dress first and then the MoG picks a dress that complements it. I’ve been speaking with my stepmother (acting MoB) since Thanksgiving about what kind of dress she will wear. She told me she wanted something long and flowy, and agreed to get in the mauve or royal blue color family.
We started looking at dresses together. She sent me at least 20 options, all long and chiffon and perfectly acceptable.
Now, MoB is going to just buy out of a store, so she doesn’t having a pressing timeline and is refusing to buy a dress until she is “at her goal size”. MoG, on the other hand, needs to order a dress. Therefore, MoG needed to get her dress first. I cleared this with MoB, verified the style, and even sent her a photo of the dress MoG planned to get before MoG bought it. MoB approved, and MoG went ahead with the order.
I should say, MoG has been extremely anxious about the mother dresses going together. She doesn’t want to look out of place and was pretty nervous when I told her she could get her dress first, but she agreed.
Well, come Sunday MoB sends me ane mail. About a month ago she’d sent me a listing for a floor length chiffon, Grecian-inspired dress and said that she thought it was the one. Sunday’s email says she’s picked the dress and is going to get it Friday — except that when I click the link it takes me to a tea length, stiff taffeta dress. Um, what? I email her back, thinking maybe she sent me the wrong link. I remind her we decided on a long dress, and that MoG already bought her dress based on that. “Oh,” says MoB, “well that other dress was nice, but where would I ever wear it again? This short one is more versatile.”
Bees, I don’t know if I’m just being bridezilla or something, but I can’t even believe I’m having this conversation with MoB. The MoG already got her dress based on what MoB told me! MoB had the opportunity to pick a short dress and never wanted one … until it’s too late. I don’t want her spending a ton of money on a dress she won’t wear again, but I also think that she should have thought of that before if it was going to be a problem for her.
I did my best imitation of “putting my foot down” (something I’m not good at) and got no response. I asked me little sis when I was talking with her if MoB is mad at me, and little sis says no, but that MoB wants to talk with me about it when I’m visiting this weekend. I’m perturbed because I don’t think there’s anything to talk about — and also because I’m visiting this weekend because MoB is doing me a favor and teaching me to make marmalade for favors. How can I tell her no when she’s in the process of helping me with a really big task?
What do I do — give in and hope MoG will understand, or hold my ground and make MoB upset?
(This is way too much drama over a hemline.)