Post # 1
I just got a text from the bride that her mother has set the date and booked the venue for her bridal shower! Now, me being the Maid/Matron of Honor I was a little surprised that I didn’t even get the courtesy of an e-mail or phone call (both of which the MOB has).
The wedding is in late August so while I have been calling places, crunching numbers, and pinning like crazy, I hadn’t made any big moves because it’s only January! I feel completely steam rolled! Her mother has money so she’s more than able to foot the bill, but considering she’s footing the bill for the entire wedding I would think she wouldn’t mind sitting this one out.
There’s 8 bridesmaids which would have made splitting the cost easy on everyone. It makes me feel sheepish, like she didn’t think I was capable of hosting a nice enough event. I asked another bm if this means I’m just “off the hook” or if I should plan a second, smaller, “girlfriends” shower. She said to consider myself off the hook, that the MOB would most likely invite all the family and friends so a second wouldn’t be necessary.
Any bee’s also been the victim of a hijacking
Post # 3
@NikkiKillpretty: Did you TELL the bride you were planning a shower? I know it’s traditional for the Maid/Matron of Honor to do it, but I’ve noticed a lot more instances of family hosting them lately. Maybe she just didn’t know anyone was planning one and went forward on it.
Post # 4
@NikkiKillpretty: Did you tell anyone you were planning anything? I have been Maid/Matron of Honor three times and have never been the main hostess for a shower because the MOB or aunts wanted to do it and I felt that it probably meant more to them. I don’t think that she had doubts about you hosting it- if anything she probably thought she was being nice.
Honestly, I would just be happy that you’re off the hook. I would just reach out to her mom and ask what you can do to help.
Post # 5
My aunt and cousins are planning my shower. The bridesmaids didn’t have any solid plans and my aunt offered so I said sure. I think you’re off the hook and don’t need to plan another one. Just plan the bachelorette and be happy you have less planning!
Post # 6
I’d just roll your enthusiasm into the bachelorette party!
Post # 7
If you want to still plan something, why not plan a bridesmaids’ luncheon? You don’t have to book a venue for it, just make a reservation for brunch at a cute restaurant. Make it informal and/or casual, and invite just the bridesmaids and the bride. Plan it ahead of time so the other bms can make it. And wedding talk is fair game! And then just have the bms split the bride’s bill or something. The bride will appreciate the gesture, and I’m sure she’d appreciate some friend time to vent/talk about the wedding with her best girlfriends. And it will give the bridesmaids an opportunity to get to know each other (if they don’t already).