- 8 years ago
- Wedding: May 2012
Hello, my fellow insomniac bees!
So, I’m getting married in May and my best friend of 25 years got engaged a few months after and will be married nearly 2 months after mine.
I wrote here a while ago that I was worried with her engagement (and super close wedding date) that she would be too preoccupied with her own wedding planning to be a part of mine. I let it go, and took all the wise bees advise to believe that this would bring us together and that we’d share in each other’s happiness and planning.
When my MOH’s mom decided her shower needed to be in March (a whole month before mine and five months from her wedding day) I didn’t make a fuss. I got my planning gear on, made several conference calls with the other bridesmaids and got it together. I even made sure to check-in with her mother to make sure everything was right and ready.
Now, backstory: Since she got engaged, she never asks me about my wedding or if I need help; however, she will call last minute every weekened and ask if I can come check out venues, go dress shopping and first fittings, help find bridesmaid dresses, etc. As my bestfriend of 25 years I had hoped she’s be even slightly interested to ASK me how things are going — I wind up at the end of conversations saying, “oh, and my wedding planning is going well/not well” and I get nothing back from her 🙁
Now, my shower is coming up in April and she had supposedly been working with my other two bridesmaids (who live out of state) and my mom (who is paying and organizing EVERYTHING). Her only responsibility? Make sure that the bridesmaids knew the plan for the shower (location and time) — that’s it. No decorations, no planning — just coordinate with the other ladies.
Now, my other bridesmaid spends hours upon hours on handcrafted invitations. I get mine in the mail and you can tell it took her hours just to do 1-2. I’m overcome with appreciation when I see the location — it’s wrong. And worse? All of the invitations have already gone out.
I call my Maid/Matron of Honor and she says, “Oh, your mom didn’t say anything about a different location” to which I call BS when she had even spoken to ME that they were changing the venue so it was closer to the airport for the other bridesmaid who needed to leave. Worse, she didn’t even communicate with the other bridesmaids or confirm anything with them. In this day and age of text, email, cell phones and FB, I’m not sure if I believe it. And throwing my mother under the bus and lying? Priceless!
I spent last night with my fiancee making new invitations to get out the door with the corrected shower location and she didn’t even ask to help correct the issue or apologize.
I guess I’m not surprised, Over the last 25 years she’s been self-centered in our relationship. I had hoped this would be a tine of joy we could share together but frankly, I feel like I can’t trust her and more importantly that she doesn’t care.
Sorry for the rant — just hurt…