(Closed) MOH Decision

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee

artdecogal:  She has no duties except to buy the appropriate attire (within her budget) and show up, on time for your wedding.  Anything else is completely voluntary.

Remember, the point of having a Maid/Matron of Honor and wedding party is to HONOR those individuals who you feel are your nearest or dearest.  It is not to have someone be there to help you plan things or to help coordinate parties for you.

So if this person is your closest and dearest friend then you should ask her to be your Maid/Matron of Honor.

Post # 4
Member
47278 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

artdecogal:  Her beavior and her very nature are not going to change because you are getting married. The only thing you can change is your expectations.

Post # 5
Member
309 posts
Helper bee

There are posts like this daily where people are upset that the Maid/Matron of Honor isn’t doing the duties that the bride thinks they should be doing. You know going into it she is a flake. You need to decide what your expectations of her are. Do you expect her to do more than show up? Can she show up on time? If you want more than that you will probably be dissapointed and posting at a later date complaining.  If she is your longest best friend ask her and if she colunteers for more just be greatful.

Post # 6
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee

artdecogal:  But you know how she is and she is not going to change whether you make her a Maid/Matron of Honor or a Bridesmaid or Best Man or even invite her as just a guest.  And if something goes wrong with cross state planning she doesn’t have to help.  Planning is on you and your Fiance.

Look, she is an adult and you obviously want her as your Maid/Matron of Honor.  So ask her.  Then it is up to her to figure out when to book her travel, buy her dress, etc.  All you can do is provide her with the information and then let it go.  

Post # 7
Member
4815 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

artdecogal:   Does your budget allow for a wedding planner or even a Day-of Coordinator in the city of your ceremony?  

Post # 8
Member
1387 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

If I were you I would ask her to be the Maid/Matron of Honor, but count on her being flaky. The only thing I asked my bridesmaids to do was get a dress (of their own choosing, but in a color that I selected), and that was 9 months ago. The ones that are flaky still haven’t gotten theirs and the wedding is in February. 

Post # 9
Member
1647 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

artdecogal:  I’d have her as a Maid/Matron of Honor but expect that she will show up in a dress that may or may not be of your liking. 

The topic ‘MOH Decision’ is closed to new replies.

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