Post # 1
I was hoping for brides’ opinions on Maid/Matron of Honor duties for bachelorette parties. I’m my friend’s Maid/Matron of Honor and her bachelorette party is in May in Vegas. Her mom is the primary planner behind this party because I had originally not been able to go (financial issues, grad student). I arranged a way to go and have been the force behind getting the bridesmaids/guests organized and figuring out the schedule. We are all splitting the costs pretty much equally and also covering the bride’s costs. I was just reading a thread about a Maid/Matron of Honor paying for the favors/decorations. I didn’t even think of that aspect. Am I expected to buy favors for the girls? And decorate the room? We will all be checking in at the same time so that feels like it may be impossible. I am planning to throw the bride a lingerie shower for one of the days and will be supplying cupcakes for that. I didn’t think of decorations for the lingerie shower. I guess I’m not sure what brides expect. I’ve been to bachelorette parties before but they have always been low-key, in-town affairs (just going out for one night to bars).
I don’t have much money. My friend knows this. However, she has mentioned many times (not intentionally) that this party means a lot to her. It almost seems like a bigger thing than the actual wedding. Bachelorette parties have never really interested me, I’m not even having one. So it is hard for me to put myself in her shoes and try to plan the best party ever. What do you girls expect from your Maid/Matron of Honor if you are having a bachelorette party? Should I cover more of the costs? Should I bring favors for everyone? Do I need to plan extra special things? If so, what are they?
Post # 2
Favors are for kids’ parties.
Decorating is optional (but fun). If you have miscellaneous expenses like decorating, it is reasonable to take a set amount of money from each girl attending.
I always think of bachelorette parties as a gift from the girls to the bride; and like any gift it’s whatever the givers can afford, and the recipient can’t make demands. So it rubs me the wrong way to have the bride and her mother organising it and expecting certain things. All I wanted was a fun time with my friends, and hopefully your friend (who I assume is pretty well your best friend if you’re MOH) is the same. To summarise: if the bride is disappointed that’s her problem not yours.
Post # 3
I think for me, “special” means spending time with my girls and making memories, which doesn’t have to cost very much.
I don’t think decorations are necessary for an out of town bachelorette weekend, and the lingerie shower sounds like fun!
Maybe just get the tiara and/or sash that says bride, so she can have some fun pics. But other than that, I am sure this will be special for her because you and all her friends are there. That should be more than enough.
Post # 4
jeg14: we went ton a one night vacay for my friends bach party and had the same situation that we all arrived at the same time so couldnt decorate the room for when she got there – but we did have a spa afternoon booked so whilst she was in getting her massage one of the other BM’s and I ran up to the room and jsut blew some balloons up put a couple of banners up and sprinkled some confetti and ran back down – she had no idea and was so suprised and happy when she saw it! it doesnt have to be expensive but little touches make a big impression – if you could nip off for 20 mins you could possibly do something simular
Post # 5
Definitely don’t need favors!! Decorations are fun though, and can be super duper cheap. Hit up the dollar store, and buy cheap balloons, streamers, confetti, and a crown / tiara or sash for the bride. When you guys are getting ready to go out for the night, or before the lingerie shower, have one of the other girls bring the bride on a quick ‘errand’ to the local store because she forgot something. Then decorate so it’ll be a surprise for her when she gets back! If you ask each of the girls to pitch in $5 or $10 that should definitely be enough to cover decorations if you can’t afford it!