Post # 1
Hello fellow bees!
So, years ago my best friend and I said we would be eachother’s maid of honor in the event that we ever got married. Problem is, we definitely aren’t as close as we used to be and I feel like she isn’t really there for me but she still thinks she is my MOH! How do I tell her that she is only going to be a bridesmaid?? I’m actually having a man of honor (my gay best friend) because we are way closer and he’s really excited about my wedding… it’s just hard to figure out how to explain this to her. Any advice would be appreciated!
Post # 3
@beachbride127: you just explain that same thing to her. I was a Maid/Matron of Honor last year for a good friend’s wedding but I have muh closer friends so she is just a bm and someone else is my
Maid/Matron of Honor. She totally understood (she mightve even been relieved).
Post # 4
Is she going to be right next to him? How would you feel about making him the Man Of Honor and her the Maid of Honor? No rule about only having one. Or just tell her that she is a bridesmaid.
Have you already formally asked her? If not, make up a cute little way to ask and put ‘Will you be my bridesmaid?’. That way she knows and you don’t really have to tell her.
ETA: My best friend, who is getting married in May, made the same deal with her cousin when they were kids. They are not as close any more and wanted me to be her Maid/Matron of Honor. She told her cousin that she was going to be a bridesmaid and that I was her MOD and her cousin was a little upset but totally understand. I have made sure that her cousin is very involved in the shower and she stills feels included.
Post # 5
I thought about having him as the man of honor and her as maid of honor, but she just doesn’t seem excited to plan anything with me. I haven’t formally asked her but she keeps saying “well I’m your maid of honor, so I have to help you look at things I guess” … my man of honor always wants to talk about my plans and colors, what would look good together. I’m not sure what order I want everyone in at the alter, is there a rule about how they stand (ie: tallest to shortest)? haha
Post # 6
@beachbride127: I would just be totally up front and honest with her. “I’m having so and so as my Man of Honor, but would still like you to be a bridesmaid”
My best friend got married about 4 years ago now and I was her bridesmaid and at first I was a little hurt by it, but I understood completely her having her sister be her Maid/Matron of Honor. Not only the fact that they are close, but HELL the stuff her sister did for her bridal shower and bachelorette party there was NO way I could have afforded to do it as nice for her.
Post # 7
@waitingalongtime I see how that could be a little hurtful and I want to avoid it, but I guess it would be less painful the sooner I say it!