(Closed) MOH here! Help me? Bridal Shower and Bachelorette Party 101

posted 6 years ago in Parties
  • poll: Help me?
    I only clicked on this because it had a poll. But I'll help you out! :) : (3 votes)
    25 %
    Both parties on the same day. After the bride turns 21. : (2 votes)
    17 %
    Different days, bachelorette party (at least) between July and the wedding. : (7 votes)
    58 %
  • Post # 3
    1112 posts
    Bumble bee

    Are they supposed to be a surprise?

    Not neccesarily. None of my stuff is a surprise.

    How much as I supposed to get the bride involved?

    You can ask her preferences, but keep in mind she is stressed about a lot of decisions right now. As a bride, I do NOT want to be involved in my showers/party planning. I want to just show up. Haha.

    Who do I invite to each one?

    Bridal shower – you can invite older ladies, relatives, guests, all the bridesmaids, female wedding party members, etc. Bachelorette party – invite friends around your own age.

    Do they happen on the same day?

    Not neccesarily. Mine aren’t! Some people like to do them on the same weekend if a lot of people are coming from out of town. This eliminates guest travel time/costs. But all my guests are in town so it doens’t matter for us. Mine is more spread out. If you spread it out, do the shower before the bachelorette party.

    How do I organize it?

    Seek help from some of the other bridesmaids and/or the bride’s female family members (if they are willing to help). You can also seek help from your family if they are involved.

    People get stuff for the Bridal shower off a registry, right?

    Yes. At least they should!

    Is that the same as the wedding registry?

    Yes. You can list the stores the couple is registered at on a shower invitation, but not on a wedding invitation. As Maid/Matron of Honor, something very helpful you can do is let guests know – by word of mouth – where the couple is registered.

    What should I do for the bachelorette party?

    You could do a weekend away – lake house, spa weekend, mini mountain retreat, something relaxing. OR you could do soemthing wild. Night on the town, bar hop, fancy dinner…it depends on what the bride likes to do. As her Maid/Matron of Honor you know her very well – pick her brain about what kind of activities she likes. Would she rather be pampered with all her favorite ladies or go out to a nice dinner, or simply go get smashed and barely remember it? haha.  Do what she would like.

    What did you do for yours?  What did you like/ dislike?  What do you wish had been done or not done?

    I’m not a big party girl so we’re just doing a lingerie party. I love me some lace undies! Haha. we are doing dinner and then that.

    Post # 4
    1112 posts
    Bumble bee

    If you have any other questions let me know. Also you can find websites that can really help with your role as Maid/Matron of Honor. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 5
    1048 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I’m the bride and I have a hand in planning both the bridal shower and bachelorette party.  This is partly because the bms don’t know each other very well and they are scatterd all over the state and partly because I like to do things myself. I’ve also been in the wedding biz as a makeup artist for almost 10 years and I’ve seen a lot of these events from countless friends weddings.  It feels really weird to be on the other side of things.  I love doing things for other people but I have guilt about having others do things for me.  I’m a people pleaser. 


    I ordered all my event invitations from Zazzle.com, they are really easy to use and they have huge discounts all the time.  I wait for at least 50% off sales.

    For the shower I’m putting together the food ideas, decor(using a lot of stuff from wedding centerpieces), made the guest list, sent out invites, found the venue and such.

    Post # 6
    3569 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I think when I been involved in planning the most important thing is to keep the brides taste in mind. For example if your bride is low key, maybe a trip to the beach or spa is better then a big night out, with penis cookies, and crazy outfits.

    Second ask other bridesmaid what their budgets and what do they have time to do. So you know exactly where you stand and what kind of help you will have. 

    Brides should supply guest list, and maybe a few suggestions but nothing overboard as this isn’t her party to plan. Also a lot of times you may find that you work with a family member so brides aunt or mom on the shower.

    I think being organized, nipping any drama in the bud so the bride doesn’t have worry about it. Don’t leave anything until the last minute.


    Post # 7
    3750 posts
    Honey bee

     First off: deep breath, sweetie ๐Ÿ™‚ I’ll answer all of your questions!


    So what in the world do I do? I have only been to one bridal shower (BS) and bach party (BC) which were on the same day. It was actually kind of nice that I didn’t have to worry about travelling twice. On the other hand, they did take up a lot of my Saturday.

    Are they supposed to be a surprise? You can make them a surprise with the details, but I think the best idea is to include your bride in on at least the dates/times so she can schedule her life around them.

    How much am I supposed to get the bride involved? Aside from taking into account her schedule and tastes (disliking penis-shaped objects), I’d say you don’t have to keep her involved. If she’s really picky, you may want to ask, but it is not necessary.

    Who do I invite to each one? Unless you are related to the bride, this is something you’ll have to ask her. Typically, for the BS, you invite most, if not all, of the women who are invited to the wedding. For the Bridal Party, it’s the bridal party + those females who are nearest and dearest (usually young) to the bride.

    Do they happen on the same day? As I said above, they can be. I’d say do whatever you feel comfortable with. My concern if you have them while you’re still in college, is having them on different weekends will definitely be more of a cost for you, so I’d say, have it on the same day.

    The wedding in late October and the bride turns 21 early July so they would both (?) have to be between July and October of this year… the bachelorette party at least.How do I organize it? Typically the BS is about 3 months before the wedding. So, the end of July would be a great time to have them. This would help offset the costs as well. You could have the BS at a park (summer, hello :D), or a Bridal Party swimming party.

    People get stuff for the Bridal shower off a registry, right? Is that the same as the wedding registry? Yes, they are the same. Make sure your bride has one set up and you know where she is registered.

    What should I do for the bachelorette party? Drinking copious amounts of alcohol is a given! lolBut I know the bride isn’t into male strippers or various things shaped like a penis. And we’re all poor college students so no trips to Vegas! What did you do for yours? I haven’t had mine yet. Since you are all rolling in the money (j.k.) you could have a pool party during the day then at night go to a house, have pizza, wine/beer/shots, and play Dirty Minds, or dirty Apples to Apples. You don’t have to have penis-shaped stuff. Or if you’re not into games, you could do at-home make-overs. Or, if you do want to go out a little, why not go out to a swanky martini bar, or a cool restaurant for dinner, then head back to a house. Or, you could have a middle-school-esque sleep-over. Ya know, with “Clueless” and Truth or Dare. Or just have a movie night-those are always fun! Just don’t forget to have everyone bring their favorite bottle of wine/booze/beer.

    What did you like/ dislike? What do you wish had been done or not done? (Sorry, these are the only 2 I cannot answer).


    I hope this helps, please let me know if I can help any more.

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