(Closed) MOH is distant, actually…absent

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
18637 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I would talk to her about it face to face.  She might not have a ton of time to dedicate to duties as a bridesmaid.  I didn’t have a bridesmaid that was actively involved in planning.

Post # 4
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

i would send her a msg to her email and find out if everything is okay with her and why you havent been hearing from her. you can ask her if she feels she is now too busy or occupied to be able to carry out her moh duties 

Post # 6
10366 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think you need to try harder to talk to her, and confront her about the non-responsiveness in a nice and understanding way. There might be something going on that you don’t know about. If you’ve known her that well for that long, you should be able to approach this by giving her the benefit of the doubt and being understanding. We can’t tell you anything you don’t already know. We can’t help you – go ask her!

Post # 7
379 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I am in the same situation with my Maid/Matron of Honor.  I bet she is jealous.  But remember jealously is just a feeling that you cannot control.  I know my Maid/Matron of Honor is still my friend.  But her actions are not one of a good Maid/Matron of Honor.  You wouldnt do that to her during her wedding.  So you should talk to her about it. 

I was thinking about asking my Maid/Matron of Honor if she wants a co-maid of honor.  I totally understand the politics situation.  But word it in a way that the decision is totally up to her.  But you never know something else might be going on in her life so you should talk to her and see if she is having some problems.

Post # 8
1871 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I’d try to talk to her if possible. I wouldn’t assume she’s jealous because there could be many other reasons for what’s going on, but if she is, and she’s your friend, then I might try to cut her a little slack–it’s nice to have your Maid/Matron of Honor at things like engagement parties, but it’s not necessary; it IS more necessary for her to come to fittings though, so don’t cut her THAT much slack.

Post # 10
348 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

@annapeeps: If she’s been with her boyfriend longer and has been waiting for a ring, it’s probably just jealousy. Not that it makes you feel any better, but I’m guessing this issue is less about you, and mostly about her own issues.

Post # 11
987 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

I’ve noticed that on the whole, those who are not yet engaged or married don’t really care as much.  I’d just take it as unfortauntely she’ s just not that interested.  This doesn’t make her a bad friend.  The most important thing is for you to be happy and have fun with your plans.  Engage her where you can, but let the rest go.  Dont’ ruin this wonderful time worrying!! Best of luck xo

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