- 5 years ago
- Wedding: January 2014
Some of you may be able to help me if you have had experience with a bridesmaid who may be jealous of you getting married.
I got married 2 weeks ago. My Maid/Matron of Honor is my best friend for 15 years. We have been through everything together, and have always been close. When I first got engaged, she was excited and we had fun going to bridal shows, looking at dresses, etc.
Jump to 3 months before the wedding….
Maid/Matron of Honor is a very outgoing person, always talking…first one on the dance floor. She is the funnest person to be around. At my shower, she was quiet, didnt talk to many people, left without saying goodbye and didnt help with the cleanup, etc. I didnt really notice anything except her not saying goodbye, my mom had mentioned something to me that she was acting odd.
Bachelorette Party time. Girls are trying to plan and she said “I dont want anything to do with the planning dont ask me”, meanwhile her dad owns limos so the girls thought they could get a limo from her dad to rent. Night of the bachelorette she was sulky, texting the whole time and kept to herself. This is not like her. My mom actually yelled at her at one point (this is what my sister told me) and said go dance with the bride your the Maid/Matron of Honor whats wrong with you!
During this time everything is fine beteween us. She hasnt mentioned anything to me about being upset and I was just going to brush her not being herself under the rug. I asked if she was OK and she just said yes.
My husband was having issues with work and getting paid at the time and i was talking to her about it. Just venting. She sends me an email the next day and says “Make sure this is what you want. I wouldnt marry anyone I had to support”. !!!! I didnt even say anything about supporting anyone.
Month before the wedding comes around. I asked her if she could help me with some things, and if she was going to be off the day before the wedding (to help me get my gown, do errands, etc) She was busy every day I asked her and said she wasnt taking the day off. No big deal but this is someone who can take days off for 3 months and still get paid. Thats how much vacation time she has. I thought she would take the day off before and help me but I dont expect people to not work. But your my Maid/Matron of Honor its a special time, for her and I too.
2 days before wedding she is MIA. DIdnt ask if I needed help. Acted all quiet, didnt say hi to anyone at the rehearsal dinner, left early and ignored my husband. Day of the wedding she showed up at my room at 2:30 dressed and ready and I was getting my makeup done. If another bridesmaid asked if I needed something, she shot them a dirty look. ??? At the wedding she looked so miserable and everyone asked me during the next week what was wrong with her. She left the wedding early and during the entire wedding didnt say one word to my husband. He is convinced she doesnt like him…we have no idea why. The next day, him and I are blocked from her facebook (real mature). I asked her about it and she said I aliented her all weekend and it looked like i didnt want her there. It was my wedding!! It was crazy! Ton of people! She didnt help me all day when I needed help! But then said it looks like I dont want to be friends with her. She has done this to other friends in the past…..it seems if the attention is not on her, she has a hissy fit. We are 30 and 33 years old. Its crazy!
I said I wanted to sit and talk with her in person, face to face. Let’s just get it out on the table. Not worth throwing away a friendship for. She keeps blowing me off with excuses on why she cant get together.
Do I let it go? Do I wait? Everyone was appalled at the way she acted at my wedding and all the events but to me its in the past and I can’t get mad about it because in the end I had a beautiful day with my husand. I just wish she didnt act like that and actually shared the day with me.