Post # 1
I’m having 2 BMs and a Maid/Matron of Honor. My Maid/Matron of Honor went with me 2 months ago to pick out dresses. She chose hers, (and I love the dress) and she helped me choose a slightly different style for the other 2 girls. She didn’t order hers that day because they wanted half down to place the order and she said she didn’t have the money right now. The dresses are $150. Ok, fine. A couple weeks later I was taking the other 2 to get measured and order theirs. Maid/Matron of Honor said she wanted to go with and then backed out at the last minute. She still, 2 months later, hasn’t ordered it. She lives 5 minutes away from the shop. Well, the dress shop just called and told me they are waiting for her order before placing the other 2 which I did not know!! They’ve been holding the order for 2 months! So I’ve been trying to contact Maid/Matron of Honor about ordering her dress and she hasn’t called me back! Ugh! According to the dress shop it takes around 4 months to get the dresses in and then they wanted to have first fitting in March, so she needs to get it in gear but I feel bad hounding her about it. As far as I know, she is having no financial issues, she makes more $$ than me. I’m just irritated and I feel like telling the store to just place the order without hers and she will have to pay more if hers has to be rushed.
Post # 3
yikes… no advice but totally supportin you as the months are ticking by and the dress needs to be ordered!
Post # 4
- Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas
That’s stressful! I hope you can get ahold of her soon!
Post # 5
How long do they need? I haven’t ordered my dress yet for a wedding I’m in at the beginning of April, and it’s not a problem yet at all. Also, just because you think it’s not a financial issue doesn’t mean it isn’t. Just remind her to place the order.
Post # 6
I don’t think you should feel bad about this. I would just call her and remind her to order the dress. Explain the situation with the dress shop and ask her if she would be able to order it within the next week. I mean she is your Maid/Matron of Honor and she did agree to having to buy a dress. Plus $150 is not a lot for a dress.
Hope it works out!
Post # 7
I would just call the store and have them place the order for the other two dresses. Do you know if it’s just that she doesn’t have the money to hand, and that’s the only reason she’s not ordering? Or is something else holding her back?
Post # 8
Ugh. No real advice, just wanted to say I totally understand your frustration. I hope your Maid/Matron of Honor talks to you about it soon.
Post # 9
ugh…good reason to rant. is she still onboard to be in the wedding? i know i am a Bridesmaid or Best Man in a wedding in a few months and the Maid/Matron of Honor dropped off the face of the planet, hopefully it is not like that in your situation. is she married? could she be jealous????
Post # 10
Honestly, if it comes down to it, you may just need to pay for it yourself. Times are tough right now and maybe she jsut doesn’t have the money and is embarassed so she has kept making excuses when you have brought it up. In the grand scheme of things, if you front the $150, would it really be a big deal? Perhaps you can say that you paid for it and that she can pay you back for it over time.
Post # 11
Actually, it is kind of a big deal. I know she makes almost double what I do and I know I will never get it back if I pay for it. I know that sounds a bit rude, but you’d have to know the girl. She most likely is not throwing me a shower (she’ll leave that to my mom) and I was planning on buying her shoes so all I’m really asking for her to pay for is the dress.
Post # 12
It’s simple, just tell her that X date (give her 2 weeks) is the deadline and if her dress isn’t ordered by then she’s either responsible for rush charges to get her dress or as much as you want her to she just won’t be able to be in the wedding.
Really though, here are two thoughts I have:
– Ordering in November (actually your girls were ordering in September) for a June wedding seems early to me. So does a March fitting. When I was a bridesmaid they wouldn’t even look at my dress until 6-8 weeks before the wedding. Maybe she feels that she has plenty of time.
– Just because she makes double what you do does not mean she’s in a better position than you financially. You don’t know what her other expenses could be or where her money goes.
Post # 13
I don’t want to ruffle any feather when I say this, but if you knew all of this going in, why did you ask her to be your MOH? It sounds like she is pretty irresponsible. When you mentioned that she said she couldn’t afford it, I just figured that she doesn’t make very much money. Perhaps she has a lot of debt you don’t know about. I don’t know – I am just throwing things out there at this point that might explain why she won’t purchase it.
Post # 14
I’m sorry you have to deal with that. = (