- 7 years ago
I’m so sorry it’s a long post.
I am going to have a very small wedding, and I have decided on just having only a maid of honor. Since my Maid/Matron of Honor is the only person on my side of the wedding party, I really don’t care what she wears as long as it’s floor-length dress (for a winter wedding) in a coral/pink color. I also asked her to wear any color flats she wants. I’d asked her to start looking for a dress in July so we can get it color-matched for the best man’s suit.
Anyways, she called me in August and said that she was going to be in another wedding before my wedding. The bridesmaid dress that she was going to wear for this other wedding is a floor-length coral dress, and she asked if I cared if she wore the same dress for my wedding. I was estactic! I didn’t care. I was really happy that she wouldn’t have to buy another dress.
Anyways, here’s the problem:
She refuses to wear flats. She said that I’m going to be pretty for the wedding. Why can’t she also? The problem is she’s about 5 inches taller than me. I asked her to wear flats because I was going to wear short heels. I just thought that it would look awkward if she towers over me.
She called me recently and said she does not want to wear the same coral-colored bridesmaid dress from the other wedding for my wedding anymore. She asked me if I could change my colors to a green because she has a KNEE-LENGTH green dress that she’d like to wear instead. She explained that she doesn’t want to wear the same coral dress from this other wedding because she doesn’t want to look the same in pictures. Then, she said that she does not want to pay hundreds of dollars on a dress she’s only going to wear once. I think she was also hinting that I should buy her dress for her because she said the other bride bought her bridesmaid dress for her.
I am so sad. I don’t want to be bridezilla and say you HAVE to wear this or that. I would really like for her dress to stay within the color scheme of the wedding which is coral, pink, and gold…NOT green!!! I would really like to buy her dress for her, but I cannot afford it. I’m not asking her to buy anything expensive. I am not asking for a bridal shower or bachelorette party. I am giving her the freedom to pick out which ever dress she wants as long as it’s coral/pink and it’s floor-length and the honor to stand beside me as my best friend to witness my wedding.
I am also concerned. I think she’s more worried about how she’s going to look in this wedding and isn’t considering my feelings at all. I feel like she’s pushing me around and is trying to change my wedding around to cater to her. The wedding is in January, and I really need for her to pick out a dress so that we can start putting in orders for the best man’s suit. I just feel this is such a SIMPLE task, and she’s been procrastinating at it since July! The sad thing is I have never seen this side of her before!!!
Anyways, I want to demote her and ask my old college roommate to be my Maid/Matron of Honor instead. I’d actually just got off the phone with my old college roomate and cried my eyes out about this whole situation. I still want to invite her to the wedding. I just don’t feel she deserves to stand beside me as my Maid/Matron of Honor anymore. What do you think of this situation? How should I talk to her to demote her? Do you think I should even demote her at all?