- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
Help! I’ve tried so hard not to be demanding of my bridesmaids. But from day 1, they have done nothing but cause me stress. The day after I got engaged one of them called and said (she wasn’t engaged yet) she was going to get married a month before me and I was only having a 6th month engagement. They got mad at me because after finding my dress I didn’t have a lot of time for them to figure out when they could come in to look for dresses because the shop said it could take 5 months to get their dresses. This is all my Maid/Matron of Honor.
I told them they could pick their dresses (in my head I was thinking satin, because that’s the only bridesmaids dress I’ve ever worn, I forgot to tell them satin). When they started trying on only chiffon, I said I wanted satin, they started fighting me so bad in the shop I almost walked out. I had to compromise and get a half chiffon/half satin dress I hated. I showed my fiance and he said it was ugly and said we had to pick out a new dress and we did and I got a dress that I love now, in satin. I ended up compromising and got knee length dresses because they said satin was to hot, and they put me on the spot and asked if they needed the same shoes because with long dresses I didn’t care. I said it didn’t matter. Then after thinking about it, being able to see the shoes I wanted them to have the same shoes. All they did was argue with me about that and still are.
It’s a family tradition of mine to have everyone get their hair done at the same salon and the bride provide breakfast for everyone on the day of the wedding (some of my bridesmaids are cousins) and this was a fight. (this was my cousins, not my MOH).
They asked if they had to ride the whole day in the limo with me, that my fiance and I are paying for. To go and take pictures and everything. They don’t really want to get ready at the hotel I have rooms blocked off at because they cost $159 a night, but we are getting ready in my suite, they don’t have to get a room.
We went out to lunch and they were talking about my bridal shower and started asking me about it. I said I didn’t care I just wanted my shower invites to go out before my wedding invites and they started attacking me telling that they can’t plan my shower because I’m to opinionated. I said I didn’t want a stripper at my bachelorette party and they said because of that then I could only have one during the day.
My mother-in law emailed them emailed them to try to figure out the bridal shower and she got emails back saying it was to expensive and they didn’t want to do it, because it cost over $800. She said that is fine give what you can. She wants to do it their and my fiance’s sister who is also a bridesmaid and my mother-inlaw are going to pay for it. Then I got a call from one (yes I have 2) Maid/Matron of Honor complaining and bringing me in on my wedding shower. Now everytime I see them they complain about how rude my mother-inlaw is because they can’t afford $800.
Their dresses came in early and I want them to all get fitted at the same place, since the are knee length, this is really important to me. They are going to have the exact dresses I don’t want one girl with a dress half way down her leg, the other above her knee. I want them all to hit at the same point on the leg. My Maid/Matron of Honor are telling me because they have a friend who will do it only for them for a cheap price they won’t go anywhere else. This caused another of many fights, that got so bad that I texted every girl and said that they could get their own shoes, pick up their own dresses get them fitted wherever they want (basically I don’t have to see them), get their hair done wherever they want. they could get ready at the hotel if they want and be included in before pictures or they could meet me at the church for the wedding, they could ride in the limo if they want to, they don’t have to, and I was canceling a Spa Day I had planned, where I was taking them out to breakfast and having someone come over to give us facials and such the weekend before the wedding.
I haven’t and wasn’t going to ask them to do anything thing else to help me for the wedding. The only things I wanted was to have the same dresses that are fitted the same, same shoes they pick out at their price range, get our hair done at the same place, get ready together, ride in the limo, go shoe shopping together, go to the first fitting of theirs together and to come to the shower my mother-inlaw is giving me. I don’t even care if they give me a bachelorette pary. They were worried about cars on the day of the wedding if they were at the hotel and I said not to worry about that, we would figure it out and get them to the reception so they would have them at the end of the night.
After I texted them. My 1 Maid/Matron of Honor said it’s my wedding I should get what I want and we should talk in person. My other one kept saying how what should all this stuff matter, whats more important these details or who I’m marrying. I answered her my fiance, but I’m really into fashion and the way people look and I want everything to be perfect (I know things are going to go wrong, but I want to make sure I can get as much as perfect as I can) I said I want my pictures to be nice with everyone having the dresses the same length and everything. Then she went in on my pictures. I had to tell her to back off and leave it be she got her way to do whatever she wants. leave me alone.
Help! I’m so stressed. My wedding has become more about what my Maid/Matron of Honor want then what I want.