(Closed) MOH problems

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

1.This whole thing sounds like a nightmare. I don’t think you are asking to much.  Hell if I were you I would sit down when you are calm and explain how much of a nightmare they made this process for you.

2.The basic requirements for being a bridesmaid, is shutting the hell up and wearing the dress, getting ready with the bride, and riding in the limo and I would tell them if they can’t do those basic things then they should step down.

3. Tell them you are not invovled in the planning process of the shower and they should stop asking/directing questions to you.

4. You are sending mixed messages and adding to the confusion and choas by constantly changing your mind. This is your wedding and they don’t get a say in what happens day of. Once you make a choice be decisive, don’t allow them to change your mind.

5. Get the helpful Maid of honor to rein them in, perhaps hold a meeting/lunch, Ask them if they can complete the simple things like getting the dresses tailered the same, and showing up to the hotel day off,(unless you paying I wouldn’t force them to get their hair done at that salon). Tell them exactly how the day is going to run and what going to happen from here on out and stick to it. Its time you put yoru foot down.

6. The only things I think they have legit concerns about is A. Don’t force them to get their hair done at the salon if they don’t want too. B. Pay and arrange for transportation back to the hotel because it sounds like the limo is only there to take them to the church and reception, and they have a right to be concerned about how they are going to get home/back to the hotel.

Post # 4
Member
144 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Wow. Your bridesmaids sound like a treat! You poor thing. You really need to stand up for yourself about this because THEY are making all the decisions for YOUR day, and that’s not right! At this point, if it were me, I would not have them be bridesmaids at all. They aren’t making you happy-they are making you more stressed and upset for your big day!

Post # 6
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I think you should tell them how stressful this has become. If they have any issues its better that they save you headache and step down. This puts the ball in their court to either show up and shut up, or to come as guest and save you the drama.

Post # 7
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2012

@Sammy86:  I have similiar bridesmaids issues except unfortunately it seems to stem from one part of the family. I would send them all an e-mail thanking them for agreeing  to participate but tell explain what YOUR visions were, and how their demands are making this experience stressful and not enjoyable. Tell them how you feel that this is turning into THEIR day rather than yours and that it was supposed to be your day with them as key players and that they were picked b/c you wanted them besides you on your special day but that it is more sad than happy now to go through this aggravation. maybe they will understand if they still don’t seem to budge consider eliminating them and having a smaller wedding party with the ones that are making it a good experience for you…I had same issue with bachelorette party..I DO NOT want a stripper, but Maid/Matron of Honor continues to plan on one by her self without even consultin the other BM’s. One of my good friends just got married she didn’t want a stripper either. We still had a bacheloreete party..we did what she wanted we wanted, allt he girls wore matching outfits and we went to a club and danced and hung out! It can be done!! Talk to them..I’m in the same nightmare and am planning a discussion with mine as well.

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