Post # 1
You have been such a wonderful group to follow, but now i have a dilemma that I need help with. My sister and I were never close, aspecially after I moved to the other side of the state. When she moved up by me last year, we stared talking again. She had problems stealing and lying when she was younger, but I thought this move up here would change her for the better. In an effort to reconnect with family (since she is the only family I have living close)n I asked her to be my Maid/Matron of Honor. Lately, she has fallen again. She defaulted on her rent (where my name is on the lease), she has been stealing again and I can’t trust her at all. I’m thinking if she doesn’t have her life together, it might be too much to assume she can be my Maid/Matron of Honor and help out…and I still can’t trust her. I have another very close friend whom I can ask to be my matron of honor. I was going to ask her in the first place. My question to you is should I ask my other friend to step up from bridesmaid to MOH? Should I keep my sister Maid of honor and have this friend be the matron of honor? Do you have any other suggestions? I would really appreciate some input from an outside source. Thank you all!
Post # 3
I say keep your sister as Maid/Matron of Honor and add the Matron of Honor.
Not the same situation but I only had my sister as Maid/Matron of Honor. Then after some planning and stuff and trying to put hte order together for the ceremony, I realized I wanted my BFF to be right there next to my sister…because she IS my BFF and she deserved that spot! So I made her Maid/Matron of Honor too!
Post # 4
Also want to add that if you do this, you will probably just have to accept that your sister won’t be doing a lot of hte planning. Make sure your friend/MOH understands this whole thing, too so she doesn’t feel slighted.
Post # 5
This is tough because the problem isnt really should she by your Maid/Matron of Honor, but what, if anything you should do about your sister.
First thing is first, I would contact the landlord and ask her to change the name on the lease.
Second, I would tell my sister that I can not support her behaviors (Stealing and lieing) and that you love her and she is still your sister, but you can’t trust her to rely on her to by your Maid/Matron of Honor.
Third, do not bail your sister out of any problems. That only serves to enable her.
Post # 6
The point at which she’s wrecking your credit rating is the point at which she loses wedding privileges. Also, cosigning privileges. Don’t do her any more financial favors–she’ll screw you over and she won’t learn a thing.
Some people don’t learn until they hit bottom.
Post # 7
Thanks All. This is the first time I have done anything for her and it was with the thought that she had turned her life around. I already decided no more help. I am going to add my BFF as matron and keep the sister as Maid/Matron of Honor, but my BFF will be the one standing next to me the day of. She deserves it.