Post # 1
Hi! I’m new here. I have a question that I already feel guilty about…I don’t have a lot of girlfriends, and I prefer my Mom and Sister to be in the pews at my wedding (which is 3 months away). I asked a girlfriend, who i’m not particularly close to, to be my Maid/Matron of Honor. She agreed. I’d already been having regrets, because we’re simply not that close. I recently became reunited with my best friend for about 20 years (we haven’t seen each other for 12 years), and picked up right where we left off. We are completely loving being together again, and she’s been sooo helpful in planning my wedding. I only intend on having one bridesmaid or Maid/Matron of Honor. I’d loooove to have my bestfriend be it, but should I honor my prior commitment instead?
Post # 3
Although you intend to only have one, I would suggest having two.
I think it would destroy the friendship with your (not that close) friend. Also I think it would mean a lot for your current best friend to be in your wedding. You can have them both on the same level. Maybe your fiance also has someone else he would like to ask. If not, no reason not to have 2 people stand up for you.
Post # 4
Hmm this is a tough one. Obviously you want to person you’re really closest to to be your Maid/Matron of Honor but it’s also a little hurtful to ask someone to step down from the bridal party completely. Would it be possible for you to have both a Maid/Matron of Honor and a BM? That way you can explain to the original Maid/Matron of Honor that you and your BFF have reunited and I’m sure she would understand. But if you asked her to step down completely, it might not go over very well.
Post # 5
- Wedding: March 2011 - The Viceroy
I also suggest having two. Asking someone to step down, especially just a few months out, could be very hurtful. But I would still ask your old friend, it sounds like you’d like having her included and she may love to be a part of it.
Post # 6
I would have two, it would hurt my feelings if someone had asked me to be their Maid/Matron of Honor then asked me to step down because they like someone else better.
I would try to have your Fiance scrounge up someone.
Post # 7
I was asked to step down as bridesmaid in a former friend’s wedding for basically the same reason you’re describing. Notice how I said former friend? We never spoke to each other again after that day. It really hurt my feelings and it made her feel too awkward to address my feelings. And then she got married and moved away and we never reconciled.