(Closed) MOH really hurt my feelings today. Need to vent!

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
6512 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

That is a very justified vent dear!  I’m sorry you had to deal with that! 

Post # 4
Member
713 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

You gotta love how people will make a wedding about themselves. *rolls eyes* Just let her comment go in one ear and out of the other. When she gets married and sees all of the stuff she’ll have to pay for, she’ll understand why BM’s usually pay for their dresses. On top of that, you are being gracious by letting them have input on their dresses! So she should pick something that matches your guidelines, but it still fits her style so that she can wear it again. Don’t worry about it for now.

I had one of my friends who I was going to make Maid/Matron of Honor say she couldn’t agree to be in my wedding because she doesn’t believe in interracial relationships. She said she needed to approve of him before agreeing to be in it. Let’s just say I haven’t spoken to her since.

Post # 5
Member
377 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

That seems weird of her. Maybe she’s been in other weddings where the bride pays, because that does happen. Whenever I am asked to be part of a wedding party I just expect to pay. Even if it did come as a bit of a shock to her though, her way of dealing with it was pretty rude. Hopefully this is a one-time only event and she remains supportive throughout the rest of your planning.

Post # 7
Member
713 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@astratkotter: Lol I tell ya, people will say the dumbest things when it comes to weddings. The whole conversation would leave your mouth gaping open..she said some crazy ignorant things. Anywho, maybe that’s the issue – she hasn’t been involved in one. Just let her know that you will take her dress suggestions into consideration so that you can find dresses that the girls can wear again. If you want, ask her to show you some pictures of dresses that would work and that she would wear again. That way, you still have the final say and she has some input.

Post # 9
Member
46329 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

She may not have phrased it in the most diplomatic manner, but at least she did clarify the situation. It would have been worse if she thought you were going to pay and didn’t save money to buy her dress.

Post # 10
Member
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Wedding brings out the worst in some people and thats the cold hard truth. My Maid/Matron of Honor is a MOH-zilla!

SHe has complaind about money from day one! If i didnt kwo her fot 25 yrs I would have kicked her to the curb! You need to tell your Maid/Matron of Honor that her words were hurtful and rude! If you don’t face things head on with her now your wedding planning that you involve her is will be HELL!

If you don’t want to say anything to her and go on like you hope she wont do it again my advice from a Bee who is going through it is leave her out of everything you possibly can, share your excitement about wedding things with your mom of anither Bridesmaid or Best Man that has a better attitude.

Post # 11
Member
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

Seriously?  I’ve never known any bride to pay for their BM’s dresses.  I guess if you’re working with a huge budget it would be do-able, but most people are not going to be able to swing that!  She’s such a brat, seems to me.

Post # 12
Member
2701 posts
Sugar bee

Sorry she blew up on you, it was totally uncalled for. She may have been having financial troubles and didn’t want to tell you about it. Hopefully by the time dress purchases roll around, she has saved up some money and is more supportive.

Post # 14
Member
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I had to end up kicking two bridesmaids out of my wedding because they didnt want to buy thier dresses or be supportive. they would have rather bought beer and concert tickets, which they did all the time and claimed they didnt have any money.

Post # 15
Member
1963 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

That’s odd for her to act like that when she never has before! Is there something going on with her that maybe you don’t know about? I think I would want to talk about it with her further so that she could know that I was surprised by her reaction and make sure that she isn’t still feeling resentful!

Post # 16
Member
487 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I had no idea it was the custom that bridesmaids buy their own dresses (maybe it’s not in my country). I have been a bridesmaid twice, and neither time did I pay for my dress! However, my bridesmaid (probably my only one – not sure about having any more) has said she will pay for her own dress. I thought she was just being nice and helping out lol.

Your Maid/Matron of Honor isn’t having financial difficulties that you’re aware of is she? Also, couldn’t you and she maybe pick a dress that she COULD wear again, just to settle that little ‘annoyance’?

The topic ‘MOH really hurt my feelings today. Need to vent!’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors