(Closed) MOH Remorse

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I really, REALLY think it would be a bad idea to take the Maid/Matron of Honor title away from your sister – that’s not something you can just do casually, it won’t be worth all the hurt feelings it will cause. You didn’t make the best choice for Maid/Matron of Honor – basing it on who lives closest and is easiest to boss around rather than who you actually feel closest to – but that is not your sister’s fault.

You could always say something to your sister like, “Hey, I know that maid of honor comes with a lot of responsibilities like the dress shopping and bachelorette and all that. I know it’s a lot to ask and I get it if you decide you just want to be a regular bridesmaid. I’d love to have you as maid of honor too (even if it’s not true it doesn’t hurt to say), but I just don’t want you to think you’d be hurting my feelings or anything if you’d rather just be a regular bridesmaid and not deal with planning stuff.” That gives her an out but is phrased in the nicest way possible.

Post # 4
Member
781 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Oh i’m in your shoes.  I asked me FI’s sister to be my Maid/Matron of Honor cuz we’re really close, she’s totally like the sister I never had.  BUT…she IS 5 years younger, and she just moved to LA for Vet school (we live in SF)…and so she’s completely busy with school.  She hasn’t been around for me at all and I’ve just learned to accept that I can’t make her change her life just for my wedding.  I’ve spoken with my BFF about it, who’s a Bridesmaid or Best Man, and she’s totally cool with taking on some Maid/Matron of Honor responsibilities without the title. 

I didn’t want to take the Maid/Matron of Honor title away from her, just because we’ve drifted apart a little bit. Maybe you can speak with your best friend about taking on some Maid/Matron of Honor responsibilities!  Good luck!

Post # 6
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee

@Macchiato: That would work, having a Matron of Honour and and Maid. That way no-one is offended yet you can at least trust your BFF to get the show moving!

Post # 7
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Macchiato: Yes, since she is married I think that would be a great solution!

Post # 8
Member
1284 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Yeah, I would demote your sister. It’s just not worth it. You should definitely just ask your BFF to be your Matron of Honor!

Post # 9
Member
1577 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I was going to suggest the “Matron OH” for your best friend, helping to smooth over the issue. I would confide in your friend but not vent to your sister. However, I might durect your sister to Weddingbee. The dramatic and photo boards might interest and inform her a little more.

The topic ‘MOH Remorse’ is closed to new replies.

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