(Closed) MOH upset I bought dress without her…

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
4109 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Tell her to grow up Smile

Maybe she wanted to have that experience with you, but just explain everything you just wrote here. If it’s the dress, it’s the dress. You can’t help who you’re with when you find it.

Post # 4
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I don’t think it’s fair that she expected you to wait for her to come back.  Wedding dresses can take awhile to come in so when you find the one ya kinda gotta just get it.  I ordered mine back in January and it just now came in a few days ago.  Sure, your wedding is happening in 2013 but still.  I think you should just write back and say “I wish you could have been there and I’m sorry that you’re upset I bought my dress without you.  The salon said the dress would take awhile to come in and that it was better to order it sooner rather than later.”

But, yeah, I mean you didn’t do anything wrong.  It stinks that she feels hurt but maybe you guys can go to the salon together when she gets back and try the sample on so she can see?  

Post # 5
4354 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

It’s hard to expect that you should wait until she is in town to make decisions. It sucks but she has to face the fact that she’s an LDR Maid/Matron of Honor.

Post # 6
636 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

i don’t think it’s a really big deal that you bought the dress without her but with respsect, your wedding isn’t until September 2013 so what’s the rush? Wedding dresses take ages to come in, not other regular dresses

Post # 7
1402 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Maybe she’s feeling a little hurt because you went without her and she was looking forward to dress shopping with you as a bonding experience?  I would try to include her in other important wedding events to try and make her feel more included, even if she is still long distance for another six weeks.

Post # 8
1141 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Tell her the experience was for you and your mom. Mom trumps moh every time!

Post # 9
3720 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

“I am sorry you feel this way. I did not mean to hurt your feelings and am happy you are going to be part of my day.” 

Post # 10
3 posts

@missjewels:  What! I understand her upsetness. The best friend always dreams of choosing THE DRESS with the bride. Thats a big moment and she wanted to be there, she could just pretend that it didn’t bother her but she chose instead to be honest with you. 

Don’t take it a long way, she takes her role seriously and hoped to share the moment with you. Explain to her that you understand how she feels and that you weren’t trying to exclude her. Then ask her to help you pick something else that is important for the big day? Maybe the decor for the evening, your shoes, the bouquet?

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