(Closed) MOH with questions about bridal showers

posted 4 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
14026 posts
Honey Beekeeper

Yay for being maid of honor for your friend! Let’s see if we can help at all…

1) I’d point to their wedding website and then tell the bride that if she wants gifts at this shower, she’d better register!

2) You don’t need to order custom invites. There are plenty of cute invitations you can buy at the store and either fill in yourself or print on you home computer. My MIL created the invites for the shower she threw me all on her own with a bit of help from a local craft store, and they were great!

3) One of my favorite parts about my showers was that the people hosting the showers (my mom; my MIL; my MOH) each sent out a recipe card along with the invite and had all of my guests bring me a favorite recipe. Then at my mom’s shower, she gifted me a matching recipe box to keep all of the recipe cards in.

Post # 4
45645 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I agree with Gemstone.

1. Either tell the bride to register or ask her if she would rather have a themed shower, like kitchen, time of day, wine, lingerie etc.

2. Find invitations at the stationery store- there are some lovely ones out there.

3. Having the guests share a recipe, is one way of personalizing the shower. You can put them together in a recipe box, or buy a photo album with the plastic sleeves and insert the recipe cards. They could also be asked to bring a written wish, marriage advice, ideas for date nights, or share a memory of time shared with the bride.

Post # 5
922 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

So sweet of you to host the shower!  Here are my thoughts:

1) My hostesses pestered me for a month to register.  I was so beyond annoyed.  FI and I could not find a day together when we could go that was soon enough so the hostess could get it on the invites.  So, I just told her Lowe’s gift cards (which is what she put on the invites).  I wouldn’t wait too long to find out if/where they are registering, people like enough time to plan to attend.  You could say gift cards or money are gift suggestions.  I would put the website on there anyways, just for people to get more information.

2) I have been invited to showers via e-vites and mailed invites.  I don’t care either way as a guest.  The mailed invites are a little more personal and take a little more effort, which I appreciate.  I’ve hosted showers before and I just pick up blank ones (not fill in the blank) from Target (such a cute selection) and print my own from home.

3) Originally my hostesses were going to do a lingerie/spa themed shower for me.  Then they bailed, and I was so bummed.  It would have been fun and different (and cohesive as far as gifts).  They didn’t do anything extra special, just typical random gifts and brunch was served.  I did request no games, and they pulled out two games (a little annoyed but I played anyways). @Gemstone I did that as a host for my best friend’s shower (I was a BM) and love that idea.  It’s fun and a way to share something of yourself with the bride.  Wish my hostesses had done that.

There are tons of ways to make it fun, special, and inexpensive.  Not sure how the bride’s personality is, but there are lots of games that don’t cost much (like the TP brides or trivia about the groom).  It doesn’t have to be fancy.  You can cook or find inexpensive catering.  I even use items from Party City to decorate and serve.  They have fun colors and patterns (even though they’re plastic), no one has ever complained, only compliments.  I’m sure you will do a wonderful job!

Post # 6
8170 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

agree with PP’s.  brainstorm with the other bridesmaids to think of a theme.  the shower doesn’t have to have a theme, but it is fun. 

you can plan the food around the theme.

play games.  google shower games.

but the point of a shower is opening gifts, so this will take the majority of the time.

it doesn’t need to last more than 2 hours.



Post # 8
45645 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@miss.qwerty:  Please don’t suggest gift cards or money. The point of a shower is to gift the bride with presents- physical things. Some people may still give cash or gift cards, but that should be their choice, not a suggestion.

Post # 9
14026 posts
Honey Beekeeper

@GeorgiaBride5:  I wasn’t really into games either, but my guests at my “friends” shower (hosted by my MIL) enjoyed playing bingo with the gift opening and getting prizes for winning!

Post # 11
209 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

1) I would ask her again, and if there isn’t any movement on that front, I would send the invitations without registry information. Instead direct to their webpage where hopefully she’ll put the information. I’ve been to showers where they didn’t include registry information in the invite, so it’s just spread through word of mouth. If she doesn’t register, then it will be her fault when she gets 8 toasters, 4 blenders and 9 pairs of oven mitts. haha.

2) My parents’ neighbour (and a close family friend) is hosting my shower and just used fill in the blank style invitations. They were cute, and got the point across without being too expensive.

3) My shower is next weekend, and is more of an outdoor garden party. There won’t be many tables, so my bridesmaids are doing non-writing games. The host didn’t want any games at all, but my mom convinced her to allow my bridesmaids to just do 2 (they aren’t really doing much in terms of planning the shower, so this is their contribution). I was invited to a lingere shower a few years back, and I found it odd (how much lingere does a person really need??). The last shower I went to was a mad hatter tea party, it was really cute. There were finger foods, tea, and everyone wore hats/fascinators. 

Good Luck!

Post # 13
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Get those invites out asap, people like time to plan. Tell the bride to either register or put desired gift info on their website for invitees. No one will care if the invites are store bought, evites, etc.

My shower hasn’t happened yet, 3 months to go, but my MOH runs everything by me to make sure it’s a shower I will enjoy, plus I’m makibg half the food. I said no games because most people don’t enjoy them. We’re doing an evening cocktail style shower, with appetizers from around the world and drinks.

Post # 14
7656 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

My MOH hosted my shower and now I am MOH in her wedding so I am hosting hers.

1) I would ask her for a registry like quick! If she doesn’t give you an answer, I would just leave it as is or you can do what we did and have a themed shower. We did a Pampered Chef bridal shower and amde a wish list through the host.

2) I wouldn’t do einvites because honestly I did invites with a # and e-mail, and I got no replies back. Just go somewhere and get cheap invites if you are under the gun and don’t have a budget for it. If you want responses to be quick and have better success pre-stamp them, but from my experience most people don’t RSVP. At least they didn’t for our showers.

3) I loved the games. They all wrote down some advice for me, and I had to guess who. We also guessed what was in the bag (corn strach, sugar, baking soda, powdered sugar, etc). For my friends I am doing the advice game as well and guess what the bride wore for a prize.

Post # 15
2483 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017


1. Just add a note about the website.  It’s not your job to register her, ha.

2. Fill-ins or store bought or whatever are fine!  While I wouldn’t necessarily mind an e-vite, I am also more likely to delete it accidently.  And any “older” or really traditional invitees may want one.

3. I haven’t had my own, but this is what I can tell you… Drink made or break showers for me!  I’m not talking alcohol.  I’m talking yummy punch.  But for real.  If you give me off-brand orange juice, water, or coffee to pick from, I will be pissed.  (Not really.)  If you give me yummy fake mimosas and sherbet punch… I will love you forever.  (The coffee and water are still important for other people though.)

Post # 16
1018 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Since the shower is coming up so quickly, if you do decide evites are way to go, use Paperless Post. They are gorgeous and extra customizable and just so much prettier than I’ve ever seen from any other website.

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