- 9 years ago
Please Bees help! I haven’t told any of my girlfriends b/c I don’t want to start the rumor mill. A guy friend who isn’t in the circle said I should consider finding a new Maid/Matron of Honor….
(Future/formerMOH) and I have been best friends since college. We’re incredibly candid with one another since we want what’s best for one another. She finished graduate school last year and was starting on her own in a different state that I happen to live in. Her parents were adamantly against the move (far from home and close to FMOH boyfriend who they dislike) and cut her off financially. FH and I live in a 2bd pad and I offered her a room — furnished with private bath for a few months to get her back on her feet–for free.
The past few months that she was living with us, she would share about her new business that she was starting and there were some really bad directions her and her business partner were going in.. (no collateral, high overhead, expecting positive cash flow in less than 1yr) They’re doing a elective/service business. Both don’t have any prior biz experience. Fiance and I tried to talk to her about being realistic (starting smaller, cutting cost, low overhead) about the business given the current economy, she would say we didn’t believe in her. The worse part is that she doesn’t even like the biz location and plans to move to another city when she’s succesful so all her clients would then go to her business partner.
She’d get into arguments with her parents and bf when she was at our place. Fiance and I started joking that she was acting like a surly teenage daughter. Anyway, two months ago, she announced that she’d move within the end of the week and since then we haven’t talked. The only time we met since then was when her parents came down to visit and they invited my Fiance and I to dinner. It was for her birthday and we gave her a nice present. When I called her to wish her a happy birthday, she only replied "Oh, I forgot it was my birthday, I’ve been so busy with my business and stuff"
She’s also admitted to me that she’s envious of Fiance and I–we’re engaged and we bought a house together while she’s been dating her Boyfriend or Best Friend for twice and long and they haven’t settled down. She used to make fun of Fiance for being so clingy (he’s like static cling) but since she’s lived with us she’s gotten mad at her Boyfriend or Best Friend for not wanting to always be by her side.
The wedding is next summer. I just started planning this month. (Thank you weddingbee for such wonderful ideas! ) I’ve already told all my other BMs but not FMOH yet. We haven’t talked for almost a month and half and we’re usually a daily basis talker. Our wedding is going to be pretty nice since we’ve saved up and parents are chipping in. That might also bring up problems with FMOH since her financial situation is pretty bad—her Boyfriend or Best Friend is now paying for all her living expenses and FMOH hasn’t worked.
My question is what should I do about MOH? Fiance and I are really low key and the last thing we want is drama but I would hate if our friendship is broken over a wedding.