(Closed) Mom finally showing some interest but doesn't want to plan

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
4352 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@SouthernGirl:  Unless mom is paying for the wedding and insisting on coming, you don’t need her there. I would show her the venue  after you book if she isn’t able to come any sooner. Could you go with your Fiance to see the venue?

Post # 4
Member
5957 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Oh honey, that’s too bad….I’m sorry.  Time to call your Mom, and say it would mean so much to you if she would come to the venue with you on (whatever) day…have your appointment set and be firm, emphasize the popularity of this particular venue, your desire to book early and how much you want her there….here comes the hard part.  Be ready for both a yes or no answer from her, have a back up venue buddy in the wings and remember that whatever her lack of enthusiasm stems from, do not allow that in your space.  You can’t make her enthused about your wedding, but you CAN limit any negative experience she might inadvertently bring I to it.  Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
1548 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

wow, im sorry you’re going through this.

Maybe she thinks is too early… i think that if you dont really want to loose the spot, you should go whether or not she goes because that’s important to you.

Maybe when the time comes for you to go dress shopping she will go with you.

Other thing you can do is visit her (i dont know how far she lives from you) and have a heart to heart conversation, where you tell her how you want her to be more involved because you love her or something.

I hope this helps

 

Post # 6
Member
4352 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I would also call the venue and see if they will pencil you in for a date (if you have a specific date in mind). Some venues will call you if someone else shows interest in a particular date and give you the option of booking before the other couple.

Post # 7
Member
1239 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@SouthernGirl:  Im pleased for you she is taking interest now, maybe she doenst realise how far out you do need to start planning or maybe she is worried you will choose a place and then regret it.  Maybe just tell her you do need to start looking and you might not choose straight away so you woud appreciate it if she could come. Otherwise it isnt unusual for brides to plan everything themselves, or asking Fiance etc. Maybe ask your Mum again and if she doent want to go with your Fiance or with a friend. I think there is a lot of pressure for people to have wedding planning go a certain way ie do with friends, family very involved but everyone is different and you can do it how you want.  

Post # 9
Member
5957 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@SouthernGirl:  I’m sorry, don’t let her lack of interest take away from your fun, I hope she comes around.

Post # 10
Member
4352 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@SouthernGirl:  That makes sense. My mom is very hands off so I can kind of relate to the lack of excitement.

Post # 13
Member
771 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@SouthernGirl:  No, you are not being unreasonable planning a visit at a year out, not in the slightest.  But weddings are a lot different these days than they were when your Mom got married.  So here’s what I would do… make the appointment.  Then call your Mom and say “Mom, I set an appt for X venue on this day at this time.  It would mean so much if you could attend.”

I guess I wouldn’t read too far into it or simply assume she doesn’t care.

Post # 14
Member
1469 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

might she have financial issues? Maybe she isn’t prepared on spend that kind of money right away and she’s too embarrassed to tell you? Just a thought.

The topic ‘Mom finally showing some interest but doesn't want to plan’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors