- 9 years ago
- Wedding: September 2009
I called her last night crying because my Fiance and I had another fight about money. Well, the fight was really about the fact that I don’t have a job (got laid off from my last one) and am on unemployment. Before I lost my job Fiance would always tell me how he doesn’t believe in unemployment and thinks anyone who doesn’t work is mooching off the government, too lazy to find one, too good to work at McDonalds, blah blah blah.
I guess he never figured I’d be in this position, but now that I am, as good as he tends to be about not saying anything to make me feel bad about it, I can’t forget those things he said about unemployed people before I lost my job. Now everything he says about me finding a job really sets me off. Like the other day when he said he thought I should start thinking about taking a job that pays less than unemployment. I really didn’t know what to make of it. All I know is that when I left New York, I was a managing editor for a major magazine, switched jobs, it didn’t work out, I got laid off, and we moved to PA, because my job was the only thing keeping us in NY. But now we are in bumble NEPA and I can’t find ANYTHING. After almost four months of nonstop searching, not only did I give up on my profession due to the complete lack of magazines out here, but I’ve given up on professional jobs entirely, and tried going back to waitressing. I’m having trouble even getting that! I spend all my time beating up on myself, and take his comments uber personally.
So last night I got offered this job that pays less than unemployment, and he didn’t want me to take it? I’m like, I thought this was what you wanted? Look, I’ll do whatever you want, just please tell me what to do. I feel like nothing I can do will make him happy. I can take this job, be a worker, and we’ll be even more broke than before, or I can not take the job and constantly feel like he’s judging me for sitting around the house all day (whether he really is or he’s not that’s how i’ve felt).
My mom thinks we fight about money too much, and told me last night "you’re never going to make it," which I thought was just plain awful and completely untrue. We never fought about money until I lost my job, then we bought a house, started planning a wedding, etc., and I just think the circumstances have made our situation really difficult, and if we can get through it, things we be absolutely fine. I love him so much, and I know he loves me. This is really the only thing we fight about.
What are everyone’s thoughts? On my mom? On the job? Any advice would be appreciative. Thanks!