Post # 1
Bees, I need help. My sister and I are all grown up and married, but this is the first year that we are spending the holidays with our husbands’ families. My mom is a tough cookie, but I can tell she is sad neither of us will be spending Christmas with her. She understands, of course, but I know she is still sad 🙁 She will be with her parents, brother and my dad, but it’s not the same when your kids aren’t there.
What are some of your ideas for me to help make Christmas still seem like Christmas for my mom? (Note: I live in the same city as my grandparent’s–mom’s parents– so I have access to the house she will be at)
Thank you <3
Post # 2
Can you plan a post-Christmas get together with her?
Post # 3
No, she’s not that type of person. She would think it awkward. It’s just the sentimental day-of stuff that will get to her. Knowing it is Christmas day and all….I’d say Skype, especially since I will be celebrating Christmas in Europe with my Eruo in-laws, but my grandparent’s don’t have wifi service :/
Post # 4
I would plan a post-Christmas get together with her also if both your sister and you can make it. Do it just like you would do if it was actual Christmas at your house.
I would also take some time to Skype with her on the actual day of.
Post # 5
If you’re going to be in the same city as your parents, I would make sure to schedule to have either Christmas lunch or dinner with them.
Post # 6
pinkorblue: Oops, now I get it, you have access right now to where they’ll be during Christmas. However, you will be out of town at Christmas.
I would make sure to leave a few presents for your mom, maybe leave a dish you make ahead with your grandparents, too.
Maybe leave a video that you make ahead of time of your husband and you wishing them a merry christmas if skype isn’t available.
Post # 7
Is there anyway at all you can overlap houses on the day? I know it sounds like a lot of work– but I’ve always enjoyed it when we’ve done it.
My parents are divorced, and then I have in-laws.
So this is how Christmas celebrations play out with us usually: Christmas Eve night is always spent with my dad’s family. Usually, it’s been hosted at my dad’s house- the past couple years we’ve been doing it at my aunt and uncles since it’s much closer to where my grandparents live- and they are old and require trsansportation. If it’s hosted at my aunts and uncles, then we go during the day to my in-laws. They live very close to my aunt and uncles.
If it’s hosted at my dad’s, we went to the in-laws Christmas morning, and then my mom’s in the afternoon.
Then we do an additional Christmas celebration with just my dad/stepmom/brother/sister/BIL and DH and kids.
Before I was married- it was Christmas Eve at dad’s house, Christmas day- all day for breakfast through dinner- at my mom’s house.
My sister’s in-laws live in Iowa, so she alternates years going down there.
My mom doesn’t have a lot of other family (OK, she does- but she doesn’t see them- and that’s another story)– so I’d feel horrible if at least one of us (me or my sister) wasn’t there on Christmas.
In the future– is it possible you work out an alternating schedule with you and your in-laws, and then your sister and her in-laws? So one of you is with the in-laws, while the other is with mom, and then the next year, you switch. Or how about Christmas Eve with mom and Christmas Day with the in-laws?
There are so many wats you can work it out!
Post # 8
When I was younger and my folks would leave town and I was home alone, my mom would put together her own version of the “12 days of Christmas”, 1 for each day she was gone. Maybe put togehter a “12 days of Christmas” memory letter and definately call her on Christmas.
My son is on the verge of leaving the nest with college and holidays are in transition. Gone are the days of the big family gatherings at our house with the excitement of the young kids.
Time for new traditions and they are not easy to embrace.
Maybe start a new tradition of doing an activity the week before the holiday with you and your sister with mom.