Post # 1
My Fiance and I have been together for four years. My mom will always say to me that she’s supportive, blah blah, helps me plan, but then whenever one of our family friends mentions the wedding, she seems to have some obligation to be all “yeah, oh geez, I can’t believe it” and be all hesitant about being excited for me and makes a face. It feels like she has the need to be disapproving of me being a “young bride” (I’m 21, he’s 23) with other people, even though she’s supportive of me.
We’ve been engaged for a YEAR, I thought the whole wedding woes would subside, but they haven’t. Has anyone else experienced this? Any suggestions on how I can talk to her about it?
Post # 3
Well, you can do just that–talk to her gently and tell her that it’s hurtful when you feel like she’s not enthusiastic about your day.
However, do remember that your mom has a life complete with its own social circle and there appear to be some sort of social pressures that she is responding too–a certain way that people are expecting she behave. I’m not saying that makes her behavior okay, but just so you don’t take it personally–it may not have anything to do with you.
Post # 4
I agree, I think it’s time to say something, though gently. We have a good relationship, but the wedding has been really hard for her.
I think it comes along with me being young, and the way her friends expect her to act. As her daughter, I expected her outward support, and maybe sometimes that’s not always easy with her specific group of friends. I appreciate your input, I am a really non confrontational person, so I hope I can do this delicately.
Post # 5
I also think you should talk to your mom. Maybe she is scared to give you away or feels that because you love your fiance so much , you love her less. I think you should talk about how you feel about your fiance… why it is you love him and why it is that you cannot wait to marry him. You should also thank your mom for always being there for you etc. and make sure that she knows that even though you’re forming your own family, you will still love her and will always be her daughter. Good luck, I hope it goes well. 🙂