Post # 47
@ Mrs. Spring- Thanks for explaining! It’s so weird that this seems to be such a regional thing, I’ve been to at least 20 New England-area weddings in the past 3 or 4 years and haven’t seen it once!! It sounds like fun! I’ve heard of it in Ohio but never seen it. I would do it if it were more common in my group, I hope those of you who choose to do so have a blast with it! PS It doesn’t sound tacky to me, you aren’t forcing people I assume…but mostly I think we should all avoid the word tacky, it’s quite a loaded one 🙂
Post # 48
@ monalisa670 – like you, i grew up in boston and have never witnessed a money dance. i think if it is tradition in your family or region than it is a fun tradition that guests expect and enjoy, but to bring it into a region or family that has never been exposed to it, it would come off as embarrassing and tacky.
Post # 49
I see the point of some ladies on here, but I’m from WI and it’s rare that there’s NOT a ‘dollar dance’. I know I was at a wedding where all the money collected went to a charity in the Bride and Groom’s name and I thought that was awesome. Because it did go to a charity they raised over $3000. If mr.TKE and I were having a traditional wedding, we’d probably do this, however, we’re not, so I do not see a point in doing this, but I did vote for ‘tradition’.
Post # 50
I am getting married soon and I am from North Louisiana, while my fiance is from south la. If anyone is familiar with the state it’s completely culturally different north of I-10. His family are good downhome cajuns, while mine are all from north la. The “money dance” was done at his sister’s wedding in Baton Rouge. Sooo much fun! Not to mention they made a killing. Everyone was into it and couldn’t wait to slip them a $20 bill. Great way to talk to them one-on-one and funny pics!
I mentioned this to my parents (who are from north la) and they said absolutely no way is this happening at your wedding. My mom has been very cool and let us do as we want, but she really put her foot down on this one. Really all of my family did (adults). But interestingly, my friends say go for it and it’s expected. Part of me wonders if it’s an older school frame of mind being “tacky” or if it’s just accepted in other cultures. My mom’s view is that it’s incredibly tacky and rude to ask for money from guests who have already given us very nice gifts. She said it puts the impression out that we can’t afford a honeymoon and are begging for money. We just want to do it to add a little fun. We obviously are not doing it, which I’m a little disappointed about. I think it’s totally fun and nothing wrong with it. I just don’t know if it’s an old people thing who are offended, or if it’s just not accepted in other cultures.
Post # 51
I had one. My family is Polish and couldn’t imagine a wedding without one. In fact, I was told the older relatives would be hurt if we didn’t have one. They see it as a way for each guest to have a chance to dance with the bride (or groom). Without a dollar dance, how often does that happen?
As for the money (tacky) part. A dollar is really nominal and I don’t know that I’d put it in the same category as (for example) a cash bar or expecting guests to “cover” the price of their meals. I’m sure long ago, it was intended to give the couple a bit of extra cash to start their new lives, but I don’t think anyone expects to make a killing with it today.
As for us, we used Monopoly money that we had some younger cousins pass out. We still got some “real” money from some older relatives who insisted…but we made sure no one was made to feel they had to pay for anything at our wedding.
Post # 52
I think it might just depend on your location, not your age. I live in Maryland and just about every wedding I have been to has had a money dance (or an apron dance, which is what we call them). Our grandparents have encouraged us to do one too since weddings that they have gone to throughout their lives have typically had them, so I don’t think it’s just a generational thing. If anything, I feel like the older people I know expect them more at a wedding than the younger people.