- 8 years ago
- Wedding: May 2010
I posted a couple weeks ago about the problems I have been having with my Maid/Matron of Honor (she hates my wedding, is completely uninterested, negative, rude, etc…the list goes on). We had a huge blowup about her issues with my wedding, nothing got resolved, and it seems like it has just been pushed under the rug. Fine by me, because I don’t have time for her crap and it’s too late to replace her with someone else.
Fiance and I are not having a traditional bachelor/bachelorete party. We are shy people, neither of us care to be the center of attention, and neither of us wanted the separate parties. So, we opted for a huge camping/lake trip with all of our friends included, the weekend before the wedding. Boating, swimming, beer pong, bbq, etc. Good times, right? Maid/Matron of Honor has excluded herself entirely from everything wedding-related, but months ago, I explained this idea to her. She was appalled that I didn’t want a male stripper and other equally embarrassing things. I explained to her that those would make me uncomfortable, I wouldn’t enjoy them, and I would appreciate her respecting my wishes. She said “Well, it’s not really for YOUR enjoyment, it’s for everyone else.” She is not the kind of girl to let something go, and I was afraid she would still come up with something like this. I told her that my brother (the Best Man) was heading the planning for the party, but if she wanted to join him he would love the help.
Fast forward to today. She has not offered any help to my brother on the bachelor/ette party, which is one month away. No big deal, he’s fine with handling it himself. He sent out invites this week, and only after getting an invite, she emailed him. She asked if the girls could have a separate camping area for “dirty” things. Not only have I asked her numerous times to NOT do anything like this, she was going behind my back to make it happen because she knew I would say no! Luckily, brother knows us well enough, and he told her a big NO!
I guess what bothers me so bad is that everything I have asked her to do that is important to me, she has refused or blown me off about (look at my dress, come with me to my hair appt). She has nothing but negative remarks regarding the ceremony, reception, etc. I had to drag her (literally, I was late to my own shower because she wouldnt get out of bed) to my shower, where she complained to everyone the entire time about how miserable she was. But she decides that THIS is important? THIS is the most important thing she can contribute-the one thing I have asked her not to do?
I just feel like she is doing what SHE wants to do, rather than thinking about how it will make me feel and respecting my wishes. I still have a feeling she is going to show up with inappropriate things, and I am getting less excited about the party with each passing day 🙁