(Closed) Most important day in your life: Wedding or Degree?

posted 6 years ago in The Lounge
  • poll: What was/will be the biggest day in your life: wedding or degree?
    My wedding is the most important day in my life : (108 votes)
    43 %
    Getting my undergraduate degree was the biggest day in my life : (22 votes)
    9 %
    Getting my masters degree was the most important day in my life : (11 votes)
    4 %
    Getting my doctorate, medical, law degree, etc. was the biggest day in my life : (23 votes)
    9 %
    Pshh degrees and weddings? Something else was way more important! : (47 votes)
    19 %
    Giving birth to my child was the most important day of my life : (39 votes)
    16 %
  • Post # 47
    Member
    4047 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    Yeah, my undergrad degree doesn’t even rank. Undergrad was easy. Maybe if I got a PhD, then that would trump.

    So right now it would be the wedding day. It’s not just because of the marriage – but being loved on by so many people who matter to me. Especially because the people I love are in the US and UK – it’s the only time I will have so many loved ones in the same place, and it meant the world to me.

    Post # 48
    Member
    9544 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I feel some feminist guilt saying this, but my wedding. I didn’t even attend my master’s graduation (I was home caring for my ill mother). And my undergrad graduation was pretty fun but was only attended by parents/grandparents/some aunts and uncles and the celebration was a simple (but fun) dinner at my favorite Mexican restaurant. And I was thrilled to have a big 150 guest wedding where we could invite all the friends and family that we love. 

    So while I would say that my education is just as important (if not more so) than my marriage – the actual celebration was way more fun and special for the wedding. 

    We’ll see what I think when I have a child. Personally, I’m not really looking forward to the process of childbirth, so I doubt I’ll think that’s amazing. Baby = amazing. Extreme pain and exhaustion = not so amazing. 

    The other thing that jumps into my mind is vacations. I love to travel. So there are some trips that definitely rival the wedding. But when it comes down to one individual day it’s hard to beat wedding day. There’s just so much fun and companionship shoved into one day. Which makes sense – we put a lot of money and effort into that day, so it makes sense that it’s pretty awesome. At least for me. I made very concious desicions to keep my day-of stress to a minimum and provide ways to let me connect with my guests and embrace our community of support. So I was pretty much on cloud 9 all day.

    Post # 49
    Member
    2787 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    @MsLabRat:  I vote neither.

    I only have a bachelors (dual degree in computer and electrical engineering) and I really didn’t care for it because I don’t think it was really my passion, but the easy route (math and science was easy for me). In my family it was expected that I would go to college, so I did. I’m now pursuing an MBA and I feel the same way, I’m just doing it to have more job opportunities. My husband has a PhD and I know that the day he graduated was probably one of the greatest days of his life, but he really loved his field of study.

    I loved my wedding, because I had the chance to celebrate with family and friends I hadn’t seen in years (some over 10 years) so it was great! I wished I could throw another party just to see them all in the same place. My marriage is way more important than my wedding, which despite being an awesome party; it was really just that, a party. But my marriage is not a day; it’s an everyday commitment 🙂

    I think the greatest day so far was when we bought our first home and decided we were ready to start a family 🙂

    Post # 50
    Member
    3765 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    So far? The happiest day was my wedding day. The most important was when I graduated with my undergrad, and I think it will be replaced by my pending graduation with my Master’s.

    Post # 51
    Member
    567 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    My husband and I have chatted about this recently because we both LOVED our wedding and were super excited about it and our marriage, but at the same time we don’t want to feel terribly proud of it. It’s a decision, not an accomplishment. The accomplishment – years of marriage – comes later.

    I couldn’t tell you what the most “important” day of my life so far has been. There have been significant moments, life-changing moments, proud moments, happy moments, etc. but there’s not one that stands out as the most important. They’re all a piece of my story.

    My proudest day would be my undergraduate graduation. I was the first in my family to graduate from college, and I went to the nation’s #1 public university, graduating with honors. It was a dream fulfilled. I loved every second of college. It was by far my proudest day. Most important? not necessarily. And it also wasn’t my happiest. It was bittersweet because I didn’t want to leave.

    Perhaps a larger accomplishment was my law school graduation, but I hated law school, barely got through the last year, and was just so relieved to be done that my graduation day was less of a celebration of an accomplishment and more of a celebration of not having to be miserable anymore. And it was also scary and bittersweet because I had no idea what I was doing next. It was an extremely important day in my life, but it doesn’t carry the same type of feelings I have about my wedding day or my undergrad graduation.

    While it was not my proudest day, my wedding day was easily the happiest day of my life. My husband feels the same way. I’ve had many, many happy moments in life, but no single DAY rivals my wedding day. It was happy and wonderful from start to finish. There was no family drama. I was not stressed. Everything went perfect and everything was beautiful. It was a day of celebrating love, of seeing a couple off on a lifelong journey, of celebrating with our nearest and dearest, of wishing us well. From the moment I woke up to the moment we fell asleep it was by far the happiest day of our lives. There was not one time when I was worried, upset, uncomfortable, awkward, hurt, or anything except excited, warm, loved, and so full of love and bliss. 

    Contrast that with days I would consider my “proudest” days: finishing my first marathon, winning my first asylum case, etc. Those were amazing, important, wonderful days. But they certainly weren’t my happiest. Running a marathon is kind of miserable. Sitting in court arguing about horrible horrible things is not fun. But the feelings of accomplishment at the end of it all are way stronger than any feelings of pride I felt at my wedding.

    So…wedding = happiest day. Other things = proudest days, significant days. Apples and oranges.

     

    Post # 52
    Member
    1228 posts
    Bumble bee

    That’s a tough one.. I personally think marriages end all the time so a wedding isn’t THAT big of a day. I think the birth of a child is the thing that ties two people together for the rest of their lives so that day is more important.

    But graduation…. That is a day that cannot be beat. I would say that was definitely in my top days of all times list.. It was a feeling like no other. Being surrounded by 20 amazing friends and being able to walk with them, and having so many family members to support me? Incredible. 

    Post # 53
    Member
    1812 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013 - Pavilion overlooking golf course scenery, reception at banquet hall

    They are just such different parts of life, I don’t think I can vote. Graduation day marked the exact day of achievement, and the end of a few years of effort, whereas the wedding day was the start of something that will, in theory, keep going on for life. Graduation day I am more proud of, but wedding day I look back more fondly on… I think the birth of a/each child will blow both out of the water though.

    Post # 54
    Member
    558 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I think life is an accumulation of important days.  Trying to rank one above the other is a matter of perspective, and that’s always changing.  I’ve been married and divorced once before, I have multiple degrees with a PhD to come and another wedding day to come.  Those days, all of them, including the divorce hearings and the religious divorce, were all incredibly important days in my life and made me who I am now.  I don’t think I could pick a single one as most important.  They’re all formative, they’re all critical, they’re all the most important days collectively, and there will be many, many more to come.

    Post # 55
    Member
    6593 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Honestly, I have many important days… I don’t really rank them.

    The day I graduated from my Bsc, MSc, PhD, wedding, first lecture as a professor, day I found out I was pregnant after struggling with infertility for 2.5 years.

    So many important days that show that I live a wonderful life and share it with wonderful people. I really don’t feel it necessary to rank them against one another.

    Post # 56
    Member
    3823 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @MsLabRat:  i remember asking a similar question here on the bee before i got married. i didn’t see why someone would say this one day (wedding day) could be so important when you look at the span of your accomplishments. 

    now that i’ve had a wedding, i still can’t say it’s the most important day of my life. if anything, being married and building a life with someone else makes my life feel dwarfed in comparison to the journey ahead of us. as a single woman, my life consisted of self-reflection, growth, career development, educational development, and personal goals.

    not saying this part of me has ended, but it’s actually bigger than that now. it’s now about marital-reflection, growth as a couple, helping each other develop in our careers and education, and helping each other to meet personal goals. and now we’re having a baby!

    we have goals as a family now and it’s so hard to say with finality that yes, i’ve experienced the most important day of my life. i believe the wedding was just a fancy, awesome, and fun experience to say this is only the beginning. 

    my wedding day is a highlight in my life. receiving my bachelor’s and master’s are also both highlights, along with moving into my first apartment alone, buying my house on my own, etc. they are all highlights at this point. ask me in another 70 years (praying i live until 100) Smile

    Post # 57
    Member
    1444 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @MsLabRat:  It hasn’t happened yet but I believe giving birth to a child will be the most important. 

    I have a law degree, and while that felt very important when I graduated law school, I still had to pass the bar exam and so the actual graduation day actually kind of was no big deal in a way (my friends felt the same) because you aren’t an attorney until you pass the bar.  The day I passed the bar was pretty f-ing awesome :o) but I imagine my wedding day will hold a much bigger place in my heart.

    However, I believe giving birth to a child will trump all of that.  Laughing

    Post # 58
    Member
    22 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I voted wedding because although Fiance and I have already lived together for 6 years and it feels like we’re already married, I can’t wait to share this big day with the most important person in my life.

     

    My undergrad took 5 years and I loved every minute of being at uni, but it wasn’t a particularly challenging degree and I guess I don’t look back on it as a major achievement. I didn’t see graduation day as a big deal. I am proud for having completed it and it did lead on to my career but I think family is the most important thing to me.

    Post # 59
    Member
    2564 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I think being born is the most important day, everything after that is important but don’t really outrank each other.

    Yes, my graduation for my doctorate was important, yes our wedding will be important, yes the brith of any children will be important.  But they are all important and will shape our lives and futures, I wouldn’t say one will be more important to me than another.

    Post # 60
    Member
    576 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    I have a BA, an MSc, and I’m getting married, and none of those will be the most important day of my life, because they aren’t really changing much, they are just celebrating what has already been decided! 

    So far, FI’s and my first date may have been the most important day of my life, or maybe the day he proposed. Because those are the days we fell in love (ON OUR FIRST DATE! Like crazy people) and decided to get married!

    In the future, the day I start my own business or the day I have children might be the most important.

    Post # 61
    Member
    287 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    I think my wedding was the most important day of my life, as I hope it will be foundation on which other important days are based on.

    I am sure as my life progresses, there will be other days that I feel are important… having a child, going to my childs wedding etc.

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