(Closed) mother and sister problems

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
2397 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’m sorry your mom and sister are acting that way.  Are they mad at you because you asked your SIL to be your MOH?  Maybe you could try to sit down and talk to them about it.  They might not be aware of how much you’d really like for them to be involved. 

Post # 5
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I guess for now try to keep as much peace as possible and let it go because you dont want to risk her not even showing up at the wedding like my sister has decided to do.  She actually dropped out of my wedding through email and now has decided not to go for no reason at all.  Some people just want to pull crap like this to ruin your day, dont let it, keep strong

Post # 7
40 posts
  • Wedding: November 2011

Wow, I am so sorry that you have to deal with this type of behavior. Not only from your sister, but your mother taking sides. I know that it hurts you, but you are doing the right thing by not letting them ruin your day. I am dealing with a similar problem, my sister who I am very close with, up until 2 weeks ago has completely changed into someone I don’t even know. She is a year and a half younger than me and has always tried to out shine me in her life, career, financially, and has also tried to give me life advice as if she was the big sister. I have experienced way more in my life as I am the oldest of 5, and I have lived on my own since I was 17, so things haven’t always been easy for me. But I never expected her to act this way, she is not even trying to be involved in my planning. I asked her to be my Maid/Matron of Honor and she said yes, but after a month or so, she started being really negative, talking behind my back to my BMs, and trying to compete with me and my Fiance (inviting family and friends to her house to have dinner) with some guy that she has only been with for 2 months, but now living together, and she calls him her hubby… I have just decided to silently demote her (if she even wants to be involved) and if she doesn’t come around or call me, I will just send her a R.S..P. just like the other guest, and continue on with my wedding without her. One thing I promised myself is “As long as my FH is standing at the alter, I don’t care who else is there.” I’m marrying him, not my family, not his family, just him. Good luck to you, and Ihope you and your FH enjoy your special day- Minus the drama, and anyone who is not showering you both with support, and love.

Post # 8
191 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I’m really sorry that you have to deal with their childish behavior. It’s your wedding and whatever decision you make should be respected. However, I can definitely see why she would be really hurt. If my sister chose her SIL over me I would definitely be hurt. I understand why you did completely and I do think you made the right choice, but I’m just trying to see it from her point of view too. I would’ve probably had her as a Bridesmaid or Best Man and just had an uneven bridal party so that way she could at least be part of the wedding party. Aside from understanding her being upset though, she definitely doesn’t have any right to treat you the way that she is. I’d be bummed if I wasn’t picked for my sisters Maid/Matron of Honor, BUT, I would never treat her the way your sister is treating you and I really think you should try to sit down with her and tell her exactly why you made the decision you did and that it was never done to hurt her.

As for your Mom, She has absolutely no reason to behave that way and honestly should be embarassed. She’s acting like she’s in highschool and picking sides and being completely immature. I would talk to her and your sister seperately and confront her about how her actions are hurting you.

I really hope things get better for you and hopefully they can both grow up soon!

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