Post # 1
Okay I’m just wondering if anyone here has ever been to a wedding or has had a wedding in which The mother of the groom dances with the groom at the reception?
In my situation I would hate to watch my Future Mother-In-Law dance with my FH as I don’t like her, also we’re having a very infomal wedding, we’re only going to be 20 and 21 so we want happiness rather than etiquette.
Any suggestions or experiences are greatly welcomed
Post # 3
@JesikerK: It’s very normal for the mother of the groom to dance with her son, I’m sure nearly all of the girls here are having it at their wedding or have been to a wedding where it was done.
I feel like we need some backstory…why don’t you like her? Does your Fiance have a problem with her as well? Because it’s really the groom’s decision whether this takes place. Just as he doesn’t make the decisions about your father/daughter dance, you don’t get to make the final call on the mother/son one. I see in a previous post you called her your ‘monster-in-law’ but said she was excited for the wedding, so I feel a bit lost.
Post # 4
We had planned to do this but at the last minute, Darling Husband canceled. I still danced with my dad. In his culture such dances are not normal and he’s not a big dancer so he asked his mom if she would mind skipping it and since it was not normal for her she agreed. I agree with PP it’s his decision, not yours in the end.
Post # 5
Fiance wants to do that. I think I’ve seen it happen during the same dance/at the same time as the father/daughter dance. But Fiance wants his own dance, and I guess for us the only reason not to is cuz I’m afraid that having too many “special” dances might get boring. But yeah, it’s really his decision! (in my case, he hardly has any opinions in the planning, so I’m definitely goign to let him have this one!)
Post # 6
Hi, My Future Mother-In-Law is excited about the wedding however she i very nosy, very judgemental, passive aggressive and overwhelming. I try to be optimistic however I think I’ve been hurt too many times, FH is in agreement with me however it is his mother. She’s very touchy feely and doesn’t give it a second thought to pinch or slap his backside which I am uncomfortable with. She likes to act as if she is the MOB and pushes my mum out resulting in my mum feeling crappy, I think she feels threatened by my mum because she’s only 39 (had me when she was 19).
We want a very non traditional wedding, I mean it was “shock horror” when we said we weren’t getting married in a RC church. I am not dancing with my father as he would rather cover himself in jam and sit on a wasps nets, he is SO shy! We’re not even having a “first dance” ourselves so I don’t think she has a right to demand one.
I’m also wary of the tradition and etiquette differences accross the pond as I am in England not America.
Thanks everyone for respinding
Post # 7
Mothers often dream of dancing with their sons on his wedding day, and I dont think that’s a memory you should take away because you “don’t like her”. She is your family now. My future Mother-In-Law would be heartbroken. I also think 5 years down the road you may regret not having a first dance, but that’s just my opinion.
Post # 8
No, she is not my family! My FH is my family.
It’s not a case of just “not liking her” she has done everything she possibly can to make me feel like utter crap. If it was just up to me then I would not have her come to the wedding full stop.
We will be 25 in 5 years time and i feel that even then we will not “regret” having a first dance. We are not traditional at all.
I’ve just found out that a mother/son dance is not an English tradition anyway. probably just something she’s read online.
Post # 9
I agree it is up to your FH, if no one else is dancing it seems a bit out of place, I would polietly tell her togther as a united front if he agrees that you aren’t going to have any dances.